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The French Revolution/Backyard Dudes retrospective

SolomattGrundyPosted on 10/11/08 at 02:35:47

To compesate for lack of new cards recently, we take a look at one of the best feuds in TNM7 circuit history, between the Backyard Dudes and the French Revolution. Laugh, cry, slit your wrists, as you relieve all the memories of this epic, classic, feud. This will be a multi part series.

9/25/03 NAWA Glory(The Promo That Set the French Revolution off, a prelude to the feud)

Chris Cruise is standing backstage with the NAWA World Champion Harry Harris and the NAWA Tag Team Champions the Backyard Dudes. F.R.E.D hovers in the background with a banjo and a tequilla bottle.

Cruise: I am standing by with what may be perhaps the oddest formed alliance in the NAWA. Harry Harris, let me ask you one question, what possessed you to agree to team with the Backyard Dudes?

Harris: Steamboat wanted to do the madatory "let's hype the pay per view" six man tag team match with fucked up alliances and I agreed, because I didn't want to have any more heat with the management. Other than that, no special reason.

Cruise: Okay, your thoughts on your Rage in the Cage opponent, Shane Douglas. He did pin you last week in the center of the ring.

Harris: Yes I know. He pinned me. Yet again. The fact of the matter is this. The boy could not win the match where it counted. He could not pin my shoulders to the mat with the NAWA World Title on the line back at Truth or Consequences. He said he will finish the job he started. Well I say, let him bring it because the last guy who was in a cage with me was soundly thrahsed and it will not be any different. This is your last shot, Douglas. You better make it count because as long as I am NAWA World Champion, your title shots after this will not ever happen and I plan on holding this belt for a very long time.

Ricky Ricardo motions for the microphone.

Harris: I'm sure there is FCC laws towards incedency towards the human language against you two talking by now but what the hell.

Harris hands Ricky Ricardo the microphone which he takes eagerly.

Ricardo: 2NIGHT DA BAKYARD DUD3S AND HARY HARIS WIL TAEK DOWN AND DESTROY STASIAK SAND3RS AND DOUGLAS1!1!1!! OMG LOL TAHT IS TEH FACT OF LIEF!11!11 OMG WTF TEH 2TAL RADNES OF DA SITUATION WIL B TEH API2ME OF GREATN3S AND 2NIGHT W3 SHAL TRIUMPTH OV3R GREAT ADV3RSITY!!!1111! LOL TEH BAKYARD DUDES R DA NAWA TAG T3M CHMPIONS AND HARY HARIS IS TEH NAWA WORLD CHMPION SO OUR VIC2RY SHAL B MOST 2TALY RAD1!1!! OMG WTF WA WIL COME OF AND BAT TEH VIC2RY 2 DA MAX11!111 OMG U KNOW Y!1!!11! OMG WTF

Twizted Youth grabs the microphone.

Youth: ANYON3 GOT ANY POPTARTS!!!!!1 WTF LOL

Ricky Ricardo: MAN TAHT IS NOT RIGHT1111! OMG WTF LOL QUIT GATNG S2NED BFORE GIVNG AN INTERVEIW!1!!!11 LOL WATE UNTIL BFORE DA MATCH 2 GET S2NED AND THEN IT IS JUST CRAK3RS11!!1! OMG WTF ANYWAY.WERE!11!1!!!!!11!1111 WTF XTR3ME11111!!! WTF

F.R.E.D. grabs the microphone.

F.R.E.D: Los tipos del patio trasero le gobernarán. LOL. WTF. OMG. Xtreme.

The Backyard Dudes run off, tripping and falling over each other.

Harris: Madness, every single one of them. Anyway, I am going to kick ass, take names, retain the title this Sunday, burn out my eardrums with a blowtorch after having to listen to those three at close range, win the six man tonight, and have enough time to find out how many licks it takes to get the center of a tootsie pop. Not nessasary in that order, however. What the champion speaks is true, all my opponents will end up black and blue.

9/25/03 Glory(The French Revolution throw down the gaunlet)

We have another video involving the French Revolution. We might as well go to this one.

We fade into some kind of government building, only no one is there except the janitor who is scrubbing the floors. We pan back to see the French Revolution. Lord Napoleon is standing by the podium with his Translator Pierre Marquette standing by himself. The third member, Jacques Strap is just standing in the background looking useless. Lord Napoleon gets on the microphone which thankfully doesn't work but Pierre notices that they forgot to plug it in so unfortunately this will go on:

Napoleon: Salutations, porcs américains impérialistes. Mon nom est seigneur Napoleon et je suis très dérangé au sujet de quelque chose. Le manque de lutteurs français dans la lutte. Il est franchement effroyable. Nous ne sommes pas un groupe de grenouilles lâches. Seulement ceux qui ont combattu les Nazis dans la deuxième guerre mondiale.

Pierre: Greetings, imperialist American pigs. My name is Lord Napoleon and I am very disturbed about something. The lack of French Wrestlers in wrestling. It is frankly appalling. We are not a bunch of cowardly frogs. Only the ones who fought the Nazis in World War II. (talks in his own words) Indeed, Napoleon, I would have to agree. We are not cowardly frogs and I can take George W. Bush personally with both hands tied behind my back and blindfolded. Anything else you want to say to your adoring minions in the audience. Or in our superior language, Toute autre chose que vous voulez dire à votre public plein d'adoration.

Crowd shot seeing the Janitor doing more dusting.

Napoleon: Oui, je vais présenter un défi aux trois porcs les plus impérialistes d'eux tout. Les Types De Arrière-cour. La jeunesse et le Ricky Ricardo de Twizted ne sont pas la plus grande équipe d'étiquette dans la lutte, c'est la révolution française et nous gagnerons le championnat d'équipe d'étiquette. F.R.E.D. d'autre part est plus mauvais parce qu'il est mexicain et seulement une partie de la politique affirmitive d'action de NAWA. La jeunesse positive et le Ricardo sont des débiles parce qu'elles ne peuvent pas parler reckonized la langue.

Pierre: Allow me to repeat that challenge in the language of the Imperialist pigs. Yes, I am going to lay out a challenge to the three most imperialist pigs of them all. The Backyard Dudes. Twizted Youth and Ricky Ricardo are not the greatest tag team in wrestling, that is the French Revolution and we shall win the Tag Team Championship. F.R.E.D. on the other hand is worse because he is Mexican and only part of the NAWA affirmitive action policy. Plus Youth and Ricardo are morons because they can't speak any reckonized language.

Pierre makes a digusted face.

Pierre: Indeed, we are going to prove that stupid Americans like the Backyard Dudes do not have a place in civilized world when the French takes over the world. There is one thing left to say. The Tag Team Belts will be around the waists of the French Revolution in no time should the Backyard Dudes by some pitiful miracle remain champions much longer and that is a sad statement of the quality of American wrestlers. The Backyard Dudes are the most moronic trio in the fed and an obvious product of the poor education of the United States. We are French, we are the destined rulers of the earth, we shall not fail in our quest.

The video quickly cuts out on this note as we fade to something more revelent in the ring.

NAWA Rage in the Cage 2003(The Epic Ten Day Dynasty of the Backyard Dudes comes to a close)

NAWA Tag Team Title Match:
Shawn Stasiak and Mike Sanders vs the Backyard Dudes(w/F.R.E.D)(c)

Stasiak and Sanders go after the Dudes but F.R.E.D DUMPS THE CONTENTS OF THE BUCKET ON TOP OF BOTH STASIAK AND SANDERS FROM THAT TOP CAGE PLATFORM. It appears to be salsa and both Stasiak and Sanders are drenched in salsa. Stasiak slips on the salsa as the Backyard Dudes catch Sanders with a barely there double dropkick. Twizted Youth bounces off the ropes and goes for a senton but he slips on the salsa and lands on his head, nearly murdering himself. Well, this isn't going to be a serious match. Ricardo waits for Stasiak and rushes at him with a cross body but Stasiak catches him and nearly drops him because of the salsa but Stasiak manages to slam Ricardo into the cage before slipping forward onto the salsa into a pin. One, Two, Ricardo kicks out.

Twizted Youth is climbing up the cage but he nearly loses his footing but manages to hold on. Youth climbs to the cage and Youth pulls himself onto the platform. F.R.E.D moves over onto the platform to make room but Youth trips over his own feet. YOUTH FREEFALLS OFF THE CAGE ALL THE WAY TO THE ARENA FLOOR. Youth splats his body on the canvas hard. Youth may be dead from that blunder. F.R.E.D passes a tequilla bottle down to Ricardo and Stasiak is busy posing like a goon in the ring. Ricardo taps Stasiak on the shoulder and Stasiak turns around. RICARDO SHATTERED THE TEQUILLA BOTTLE OVER THE HEAD OF STASIAK. Stasiak smears some salsa on his face to give the illusion that he is bleeding. Either that was fake as hell or Ricardo manage to actually waffle Stasiak. Cover. One, Two, Sanders breaks up the pin attempt.

Sanders hooks Ricardo and puts him in an abdominal stretch. Sanders is really cranking on the hold and he gives a hokey thumbs up while he has the hold on as well. Sanders is really cranking on the hold but F.R.E.D has a handful of salsa from the bucket. F.R.E.D lobs it into the eyes of Sanders and Sanders stumbles back, screaming: "MY EYES, MY EYES, THE BURNING, MY EYES." Stasiak has seen enough and he is climbing to the top of the cage. F.R.E.D looks fearful and he attempts to use the red blanket on Stasiak and Stasiak is distracted for a mere second before Stasiak swipes the blanket and throttles F.R.E.D with it before pulling him down the cage. Stasiak throws F.R.E.D into the cage and he bounces off the cage like a ping pong ball. Ricardo is up and Ricardo leaps to the second rope and attempts to catch Stasiak off guard. Ricardo nearly lands on his head with a mistimed Asai Moonsault but Stasiak may have saved his life by catching him and Stasiak muscles up Ricardo before slamming him down in a Davey Boy Smith style running powerslam. Stasiak flexes before going for the cover. One, Two, Three. We have brand new NAWA Tag Team Champions for the second time in two weeks.

Mike Sanders and Shawn Stasiak defeated The Backyard Dudes when Stasiak pinned Ricardo after a running powerslam in 0:02:39.
Rating: DUD
(Mike Sanders and Shawn Stasiak won the NAWA Tag Team Titles.)

Stasiak and Sanders pull themselves up as Stasiak poses over the fallen body of Ricky Ricardo. The Tag Team Title Belts get passed to Stasiak and Sanders and they hold the belts up. They finally beat the Backyard Dudes and that ends the longest ten days in the history of the NAWA Tag Team Titles, as the Backyard Dudes are no longer champions. Stasiak walks down the ramp as we go to the backstage area.

Backstage:

Pierre Marquette is in Commissioner Steamboat's office arguing with him.

Steamboat: Pierre, there is no more room on the roster. I am sorry but you will have to come back in a few months when the New Age Wrestling Alliance has the resources to work for talent.

Pierre: You only don't have room because my men are French and so am I....

Steamboat: Pierre, I am going to humor you, but people who watch are affilate fed MWCW are not buying you being french. They remember you as Victor Domicious and you are a former MWCW Champion. That is who you are, so I don't know what you are trying to pull. Fact, you were one of the worst wrestlers in MWCW and you got ran out of the federation after an scandel involving you and a goat...

Pierre: LIES. All of them. I am not a filthy imperialistic pig that screws goats. My name is Pierre Marquette, I am a french sensation and Victor Domicious is not my name. Even if it was, I should be given a spot on the roster, because I beat Miles Stylish, who got a spot on your roster even after I er I mean Mr. Domicious beat, Steamboat, just give me and the French Revolution a chance to be on the roster.

Steamboat: Now that you mention it Victor, I do believe I may have an opening for you and your men. Meet me this week on Glory and we may discuss this further.

Pierre: Indeed, well it appears that you have finally saw the greatness of the French Revolution. Lord Napoleon will be pleased but he will still plunder the NAWA and rule it like his kingdom of 200 years ago.

Pierre turns and leaves.

Steamboat: Well, that got him out of my hair for right now.

(Chapter Two: The Feud Officially Begins. Includes the first meeting(but far from the last) at the End of the Days 2003.)
SolomattGrundyPosted on 10/12/08 at 03:30:46

Volume Two(Lead Up to The End of Days 2003).

10/2/03(A vignette)

We see the French Revolution walking out of a room with buckets full of water and mops.

Pierre: Janitorial work. Steamboat made us the new official janitors of the NAWA. This is a travesty. We are wrestlers. This is not right. This is the most degrading job I have ever done.

Napoleon: Que diriez-vous du temps où vous avez obtenu réservé pour visser une chèvre dans MWCW ?

Pierre: Abruti foutu, je ne vous ai jamais dit d'apporter cela vers le haut. And no, nosy cameraman, I am not bothering to translate that to English.

Pierre mutters "stupid goat storyline" under his breath.

Pierre: Well let's get to work. We still have to take the NAWA by storm.

Napoleon and Jacques share confused looks as Pierre is not bothering to speak in French. They pick up their buckets and mops before speaking.

Jacques: Pas que l'abruti savent que nous ne pouvons pas parler anglais.

Napoleon: Baiseur étrange de chèvre.

(Director's Note: If I could go back in time, I would ask my past self, "Dude, what the fuck?")

NAWA Glory 10/16/03(The in ring debut of the French Revolution against the dynamic duo of Super Crazy and the Sandman)

A french horn blares over the loud speaker and out comes all three members of the French Revolution. Lord Napoleon, Jacques Strap, and their manager Pierre Marquette. The crowd boos them, not because they are French but because they are poor excuses for wrestlers. Napoleon grabs the microphone and this should be good.

Napoleon: Les personnes à l'alliance de lutte de nouvel âge devraient être bénies, car nous finalement faisons notre sonnons dedans le début de NAWA et ce soir notre poussée glorieuse jusqu au dessus prendra le pli. Vous ne pouvez pas nous arrêter, nous êtes français, nous vous écraserez aimez un bogue. Oui, oui, Monsieur, toutes vos bases appartiennent à la révolution française et il n'y a rien vous les idiots moronic stupides qu'américains peuvent faire à son sujet. Nous rions de votre situation difficile. Elle sera aussi évidente que le rapport spécial de M. Marquette's avec la chèvre.

Pierre: To put it bluntly, Nappy said, we are the French, we are taking over, there is nothing you can do about it and let me just add one more thing. The Backyard Dudes are going down at the End of Days and we shall reign supreme as the top team in the New Age Wrestling Alliance. And some other things were said that should not be discussed in polite company and I will not translate.

Pierre drops the microphone and "Enter the Sandman" by Metallica plays and out comes Super Crazy and the Sandman. Crazy and Sandman have been putting together a bit of a winning streak for themselves. They defeated the Backyard Dudes two weeks ago on Glory and a win over former NAWA Tag Team Champions, even the Backyard Dudes, will move a team up the tag team rankings. The bell rings kicking off this match.

The French Revolution(w/Pierre Marquette) vs Super Crazy and the Sandman

Napoleon locks up with Super Crazy and Crazy shvoes him off and punches away at him. Crazy whips Napoleon off into the ropes and takes him down with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Nappy bounces off the canvas and Crazy rushes him, catching him with a dropkick to the face. Crazy picks up Napoleon and rams him into the elbow of the Sandman before making the tag. The Sandman punches away on Napoleon and big roundhouse right causing Napoleon to flip over onto his back three sixty. Sandman spreads Napoleon's legs and Sandman drops a leg down on the crotch, Napoleon oversells the move. Sandman picks up Napoleon and whips him into the ropes. Sandman charges in but Napoleon moves. Napoleon takes down the Sandman with a dropkick.

Napoleon goes over to the corner and Jacques Strap is tagged in. Mr. Strap itches his crotch before rushing forward and going for a headbutt but HE KNOCKS HIMSELF OUT CONNECTING WITH THE BEER BELLY OF THE SANDMAN. Napoleon is on the top rope and Napoleon leapfrogs over the Sandman before taking him down with a hiptoss. Sandman goes over to the corner and tags in Super Crazy. Crazy punches away on Napoleon and whips him into the ropes but Napoleon reverses. Napoleon leapfrogs over Crazy and turns around. Napoleon hooks Crazy and takes him down with Coup D' Etat, his version of a 3/4 Facelock bulldog. The crowd is making a little bit of noise about something. TWIZTED YOUTH IS IN THE AISLE WITH A GOAT. Pierre seems a little distracted and Napoleon goes to try and bring his manager back on task. Meanwhile F.R.E.D enters the ring with a pinata. F.R.E.D. SHATTERS THE PINATA OVER THE HEAD OF MR. STRAP. Fernado Romero Entonio Dominic just knocked out Jacques Strap with that pinata Crazy leaps to the second rope and springboard moonsault. Cover hooking the leg and gets three.

The Sandman and Super Crazy defeated French Revolution when S. Crazy pinned Mr. Strap after an Asai moonsault in 0:02:11.
Rating: * 1/2

Ricky Ricardo rushes into the ring and starts beating down Jacques Strap with a plastic shovel. Ricardo swings the shovel and knocks Mr. Strap to the floor. Ricky Ricardo leaps onto all three members of the French Revolution with a slightly blown dive. They go down underneath Ricardo. [U[(director's note: Tee-Hee)[/B][/U]

[B]NAWA Glory 10/23/03[/B]

David Flair and Barry Horowitz are already in the ring as the evil French Horn comes up and out comes the French Revolution. This Sunday only on Pay Per View at the End of Days, The French Revolution will face the Backyard Dudes in a six man tag team match. The Bell rings and this match is underway.

[B]The French Revolution(Lord Napoleon and Jacques Strap with Pierre Marquette) vs Barry Horowitz and David Flair[/B]

Napoleon rushes at David Flair but David ducks and David chops Napoleon and Napoleon actually goes down. David looks pleased at getting off an offensive move and does a poor version of his father's strut and gets creamed with a dropkick by Nappy. Napoleon whips Flair into the ropes and monkey flip taking him down. Napoleon kicks Flair in the midsection and leg over the head. Napoleon drives Flair down with a Rocker Dropper. Napoleon leaps to the second rope and backflip over Flair before hooking him in an inverted facelock. Napoleon spins Flair down and drives him down with the Coup De Ente. Napoleon covers and Pierre grabs the foot to prevent Horowitz from getting the pin and this gets three.

[B]French Revolution defeated David Flair and Barry Horowitz when Napoleon pinned D. Flair with the Coup De Ente in 0:00:55.
Rating: *[/B]

Pierre enters the ring and Pierre grabs the microphone.

Pierre: Another win for the greatest tag team in the NAWA today. It was a tough battle but in the end The French shall always prevail. They shall conquer all...they shall...

The crowd gives a few cheers and Ricky Ricardo is driving a truck to the ring. Ricardo is bumping into equipment on the way to the ring and Twizted Youth hops off the back of the truck and he unrolls a hose from the ramp. F.R.E.D gets out of the passengers seat and they turn on the hose. THE FRENCH REVOLUTION ARE GETTING SPRAYED WITH SALSA. Holy shit, they are getting a salsa bath. What orginality by the Backyard Dudes! Pierre slips and falls on his face and Napoleon is cursing them out in french. The Backyard Dudes leave with the ring a mess and the French Revolution lying in a pool of salsa. This Sunday, Six Man Tag Team Action.

(Director's Note: Unless I'm blocking something out of my mind, this is the only non-Backyard Dudes victory ever scored by the French Revolution).

[B]NAWA End of Days(Part One of One Trillion)[/B]

The French Horn music plays and out comes all three members of the French Revolution out. Lord Napoleon, Pierre Marquette, and Jacques Strap. This will be a very brutal six man tag team match, I have a feeling. Napoleon and Jacques try and look meanacing while Pierre trash talks the crowd.

"Backyard Dudez Paradize LOL" plays and out comes all three members of the Backyard Dudes looking like idiots as per usual. The bell rings and this match is underway.

[B]The Backyard Dudes vs the French Revolution[/B]

Ricky Ricardo and Lord Napoleon will begin this match. Ricardo grips Napoleon. Headlock is applied by Ricky Ricardo. Ricardo takes a running start. Napoleon is driven down awkwardly by a slight botched bulldog. Ricky Ricardo is reaching deep into his tights and he pulls out....a huge feather??? Ricardo winds up the feather and smacks Napoleon right across the head with it. Ricardo smacks Napoleon in the face with the feather again. Ricardo swings the feather and another shot to the face. Napoleon is tossed to the ropes and feather shot to the face. Ricardo bounces off the ropes. Napoleon is caught in the ankle with a Ricardo dropkick. Napoleon goes for a DDT but Napoleon blocks the move. Napoleon backs Ricardo into the buckles back first. Ricardo hits the buckle lightly.

Napoleon fires a punch to the face. Napoleon fires another punch to the face. Napoleon sends Ricardo reeling with yet another punch. Napoleon blasts Ricardo with a punch. A punch bounces off the chest of Ricardo. Napoleon sticks his hand in his coat. Napoleon winds it up and blasts Ricardo with a punch. Ricardo falls backward landing hard on the canvas. Napoleon covers hooking the leg. One, Two, Ricardo kicks out at two. Napoleon walks over the corner and tags in Jacques Strap. Jacques itches his crotch. Jacques rushes in and goes for a clothesline but Ricardo rolls awkwardly underneath the hold. Ricardo hoists Jacques up over his head. Ricardo nearly drops Jacques onto his head with a high back body drop. Jacques rolls around on the canvas clutching his neck.

Ricky Ricardo fires a kick to the groin of Jacques Strap. Jacques Strap just stands there so Ricky Ricardo reaches into the pants of Jacques Strap and yanks out a cup. Mr. Strap backs up in fear and Ricardo winds up the cup before rubbing it into the face of Jacques Strap. Jacques falls backwards, injured from the shot. Ricky Ricardo covers hooking the leg. One, Two, Jacques Strap kicks out. Ricardo walks over towards the corner. Tag, bringing F.R.E.D. into the match. F.R.E.D pulls a red blanket from the ring apron. F.R.E.D waves it in from of Jacques Strap. Strap is up and he charges at F.R.E.D but F.R.E.D pulls the blanket up and STRAP HITS THE RINGPOST HEADFIRST.

Jacques Strap staggers out. F.R.E.D grips his hands on the back of Jacques Strap's tights. WEDGIE DELIVERED BY F.R.E.D. Jacques Strap rides in pain, jumping up and down. F.R.E.D headlocks Jacques Strap. F.R.E.D rubs his knuckle up and down the head of Jacques Strap, giving him a noogie. F.R.E.D then releases the headbutt. F.R.E.D grips onto Jacques Strap and another wedgie. F.R.E.D grips Jacques and rolls him to the canvas, attempting to get the pin. One, Two, Jacques Strap wiggles out. F.R.E.D goes to the ring apron and goes underneath the ring. F.R.E.D pulls out a jar of salsa and F.R.E.D takes out a handful and puts some in his mouth. F.R.E.D enters the ring and waits on Jacques Strap. F.R.E.D SPITS THE SALSA INTO THE EYES OF JACQUES STRAP. Strap falls backwards injured. F.R.E.D is climbing up to the top rope and he faces the crowd. F.R.E.D backflips off the ropes and MISSES A MOONSAULT. That was the most complex move F.R.E.D ever tried and he missed it.

Jacques Strap rolls into the corner and Strap goes to the corner and tags in Pierre Marquette. Pierre enters the ring. Pierre picks up F.R.E.D. F.R.E.D gets tossed into the ropes with an irish whip. Pierre goes for a Tornado Spin Punch but Pierre trips over his feet and falls flat on his face. F.R.E.D goes over the corner and makes the tag to Twizted Youth. Twizted Youth leaps to the top rope. Twizted Youth is looking to jump off but he slips on the top rope and lands hard onto the canvas facefirst. Pierre sets up Twizted Youth. Youth gets snapped backwards onto the canvas. That move looked like a version of the STO. Pierre makes the cover hooking the leg. One, Two, Twizted Youth kicks out.

Pierre lifts up Twizted Youth and puts him in a standing headscissors. Pierre goes to lift Twizted Youth up but Youth fights it. Youth flips over Pierre and Pierre nearly lands on his head with that botched Frankensteiner by Twizted Youth. Both men are down adn Twizted Youth is taking it to the top rope. Twizted Youth is ascending those ropes and a high risk move looks to be in the future. Twizted Youth is pearched on the top rope. Twizted Youth nearly trips over the top rope but quickly regains his footing. Twizted Youth leaps off the top rope. Twizted Youth comes off the ropes with a 450 Splash that lands across the knee caps of Pierre. Pierre is stunned. Twizted Youth rolls over and attempts to cover. Twizted Youth manages to get the leg hooked. One, Two, Pierre kicks out.

Twizted Youth walks over and tags in Ricky Ricardo. The Backyard Dudes stalk Pierre and go for a double legsweep but their legs collide together and they fall down to the canvas. Pierre rushes into the corner and tags in Lord Napoleon. Lord Napoleon enters the ring but F.R.E.D tosses Ricardo a mirror. Ricardo sticks the mirror in front of Napoleon. Napoleon rushes back in terror, apperently scared by his own reflection. He stumbles backwards and F.R.E.D SHATTERS A SALSA JAR OVER HIS HEAD. The referee is busy tying his shoe and he did not see it. Napoleon falls into the mat and Ricky Ricardo makes the cover hooking the leg. One, Two, Jacques Strap breaks up the pin, by driving his head down across the back of the head of Ricardo.

Twizted Youth rushes into the ring and attacks Jacques Strap. Pierre rushes into the ring and attacks Twizted Youth. F.R.E.D rushes into the ring and attempts to attack Pierre but Pierre turns the tides and F.R.E.D gets beaten down. It is a pier six brawl. Twizted Youth and Ricky Ricardo have a tequilla bottle each and they are waiting on Napoleon. The bottles are swung but Napoleon ducks. THE BACKYARD DUDES TAKE EACH OTHER OUT WITH SHOTS WITH THE BOTTLE. Both men fall backwards. Napoleon grips Ricardo and sets him up in a backbreaker type move. Jacques Strap is on the top rope. Jacques Strap leaps off the top rope and headbutt delivered to the face of Ricardo. Ricardo slips off the knee and cracks the back of his head on the canvas. They call that move the Reign of Terror. Napeleon hooks the leg and the referee is in position. One, Two, Three. The French Revolution are your winners.

B]The French Revolution defeated The Backyard Dudes when Napoleon pinned Ricardo with the Reign of Terror in 0:05:41.
Rating: -* 1/4/B]

Ricky Ricardo is laid out in the ring and he is not moving. He has been knocked out with that vicious move. The French Revolution go to the back as Ricky Ricardo still isn't moving. We fade to

(Director's Note: This is the match that Ricky Ricardo suffered a concussion which would lead to one of the greatest quotes in NAWA History but more on that to come much later.)

Coming up Next, more memories with this special feature, the Backyard Dudes against the French Revolution. The adventure continues next time.
SolomattGrundyPosted on 10/15/08 at 00:27:40

[Now there was very little interaction between our two feuding tag teams between End of Days and Last Chance at Redemption, but we had several great moments including The French Revolution beating down Christopher Daniels, which lead to the formation of the Archangels of Anarchy, F.R.E.D teaming with Miles Stylish in the first round of the 2003 Unholy Alliances Tournament, the Gambler squashing Lord Napoleon, and Twizted Youth beating Shane Douglas in a match that caused Shane Douglas to give his notice after that card).

Now the interaction was more then made up for with the epic saga that was Last Chance of Redemption 2003, and I bring it to you now, uncut, uncensored, and uncooked.

[B]NAWA Last Chance at Redemption:[/B]

Pierre Marquette: Ladies, Gentlemen, and Americans, my name, for all those who have been living underneath a rock is Pierre Marquette and tonight was supposed to be a night of greatness. My tag team, the French Revolution, Jacques Strap and Lord Napoleon were to face the French International Wrestling Excellence Global World Universal Tag Team Champions The Amazing Flying Frogs of Fansination, but due to visa problems by the Amazing Flying Frogs of Fansination, this match will be delayed for the foreseeable future. Let me make once thing clear, we are not a joke. We will take over the world we will do some evil things to anyone who gets in our way. I am not sure what yet but it will happen.

A muffled sound is heard from outside the lockeroom and Pierre Marquette pushes the door open and reveals Jacques Strap out cold, covered in salsa with a burito stuffed in his mouth

Pierre: What vile fiend must have done this! Where is Lord Napoleon?

Jacques doesn't say anything.

Pierre: Rest assure that I will get to the bottom of this and those who did this will suffer.

Pierre runs off into the night as we fade back to the ring.

[OMG-LOL-WTF]

Pierre Marquette is backstage. Pierre is looking for the culprit that attacked Jacques Strap earlier.

Pierre: They have got to be around here somewhere. The culprits. Those punks have not seen the last of Pierre Marquette, that is for sure.

Pierre opens a door and he sees Lord Napoleon hanging upside down in the dressing room with a message spraypainted across the wall. It reads: "TWIZTED YOUTH WUZ HERE, LOL, OMG, WTF~!~!1111".

Pierre: What vile fiend could do such a thing? Trust me, I will get to the bottom of this. No one eludes Pierre Marquette for long.

Pierre leaves as this pointless search for the obvious culprits continue.

[OMG-LOL-WTF]

Pierre Marquette is still looking for the not so mysterious culprit that has been taking out the members of the French Revolution. Suddenly an arrow gets shot out of nowhere and misses the intended target(the wall) and just clatters to the floor. In all it's cliched glory, a note is tied to the arrow. Pierre rips off the note and reads it. Pierre looks disgusted as he reads it.

Pierre: All I have to do is meet this culprit in a house two streets away and we have have an old fashioned fight over the honor of the French Revolution in the backyard of said house. Sounds like a plan. But I don't have a car! This may be tricky. But Pierre Marquette is not so easily defeated. I shall triumpth over adversity. Vengeance shall be mine.

Pierre rushes out the door of the arena. We are going to have some kind of Backyard Wrestling Match later tonight at Last Chance at Redemption.

[OMG-LOL-WTF]

Pierre Marquette is walking up to the house. He is coming up to the gate. He is fumbling with the gate. We suspect this will go on until the next segment airs. Twizted Youth is standing on the roof, waiting for Pierre to enter. Let's go back to the arena for more New Age Wrestling Alliance action.

[OMG-LOL-WTF]

We are in that backyard as Pierre has finally unlocked the gate. Pierre enters the backyard and looks around.

Marquette: Who is it? Show yourself, or I may force to get physical.

TWIZTED YOUTH LEAPS OFF THE ROOF BUT MISSES PIERRE MARQUETTE. Twizted Youth lands in the bushes somewhere but Pierre Marquette is still looking around.

Pierre: Show yourself, you coward so I can get some revenge on you for taking out my associates. Come on, show yourself.

F.R.E.D steps out from off camera.

Pierre: So it's you. I should have known. Only an evil mastermind such as yourself would be behind such vile skullduggery.

F.R.E.D looks at Pierre blankly before pulling a red blanket behind his back.

F.R.E.D: Toro, Toro, Toro.

Pierre: All right, bitch, you asked for it.

Pierre rushes F.R.E.D's blanket but it is pulled up a second later and Pierre crashes headfirst into a shed. Pierre staggers back injured and Twizted Youth takes a running start and swings off the clothes line. Twizted Youth takes Pierre down with a botched rana after swinging off the clothes line. Twizted Youth climbs to the top of the clothes line and walks it, nearly crotching himself in the process. Clothesline off the clothes line by Twizted Youth. F.R.E.D is setting up an old door on two saw horses, making some kind of makeshift table.

Twizted Youth: LOL, LOL, LOL!

Well said by Twizted Youth. F.R.E.D is dumping a jara of salsa onto the table and F.R.E.D has matches. F.R.E.D is lighting the table aflame. They go and pick up Pierre but the fire is out before they can set him up. Pierre attempts to rush out while they are distracted but Twizted Youth picks up a shovel and scoops up some dog shit. Twizted Youth flings the shit and IT CONNECTS WITH THE BACK OF PIERRE MARQUETTE! Pierre Marquette slips on the shit.

Twizted Youth: TEH POOP, TEH POOP. GOOD GOD ALL MIGHTY, TEH POOP, OMG LOL WTF!

Is it just me or did he talk almost normally right there. Pierre Marquette is up, covered in dog shit.

Pierre Marquette: You vile fiends, setting up this ambush. We shall meet again but for today.

Pierre pulls out a small draw string bag and pulls it open before tossing the contents into the air. It is some kind of powder mixed with food coloring. The powder covers Twizted Youth and F.R.E.D as Pierre runs out the gate and back to the arena. That is the end of that chapter, for right now.

[OMG-LOL-WTF]

The french horn plays in the arena and oh dear god, no. Pierre Marquette is coming out, still covered in dog shit. Pierre does not look too happy. Pierre enters the ring and grabs the microphone.

Pierre Marquette: All right, I am not too happy about right now. Anyone with two eyes can see that. Twizted Youth and that illegal Mexican Immigrant F.R.E.D bushwhacked me in a backyard and tossed dog feces on me. DOG FECES! A man of my stature should not be getting such treatment so I am not going to leave this ring, no other matches are going to take place, until I see Commissioner Steamboat out here, because I have a list of grievences to air.

Pierre Marquette is standing in the ring but "Whatcha Talkin About" by Uncle Kracker plays and out comes Sean Waltman. Waltman enters the ring and takes the microphone from Pierre.

Waltman: Listen to me, Marquette. No one in the back cares. Commissioner Steamboat has other things better to do but unfortunately for you, I don't. So listen to me you little french goat screwing faggot, you want to air your grieviences. If you want to work out your frustrations, your ass is grass and I AM GOING TO SMOKE IT!

Pierre: Are you challenging me to a match, Waltman?

Waltman: No, I am challenging you to a dance contest! Of course I am challenging you to a match, have you had your head up a goat's ass for too long, bitch.

Pierre doesn't look too happy.

Pierre: Listen to me, Waltman. I am going to just walk away and pretend this all never happened.

Pierre turns around and Waltman plays the crowd. Pierre is walking to the back. He is keeping walking. He is still walking. No fake attack from behind, no nothing. It was almost like this little segment was to fill some time but I cannot be sure about it.

[THE END]No Only Just the Beginning]

Next Time: The greatest match in the history of wrestling from StarClash 03. Well it's either that or the infamous scaffold match.
91Posted on 10/15/08 at 01:50:35

The scaffold match WAS awesome...
SolomattGrundyPosted on 10/15/08 at 02:21:00

NAWA Glory 11/27/03

F.R.E.D and Twizted Youth are already in the ring as "Too Sexy" plays and Shawn Stasiak and Mike Sanders come out to the ring. The NAWA Tag Team Champions are coming out along with Vince Russo. They retained the belts this past Sunday against the Hart Foundation, the Next Generation and are going to wrestle the Backyard Dudes in this non-title match. The bell rings and this match is underway.

Non-Title Match:
The Backyard Dudes vs Shawn Stasiak and Mike Sanders(w/Vince Russo)

Mike Sanders and Twizted Youth start up. They lock up and Sanders shoves Youth into the corner before Sanders punches away on Youth and whips him into the rope. Powerslam takes him down and Sanders puts Youth in abdominal stretch. Sanders grabs the ropes from behind the back of the referee and the French Revolution are out from the back. Pierre Marquette pulls F.R.E.D. off the ring apron and pounds away on him. Lord Napoleon is on the ring apron and Jacques Strap has F.R.E.D set up and Reign of Terror delivered to F.R.E.D. Sanders takes Youth down with a pumphandle suplex and picks up Youth on his shoulder before making the tag to Shawn Stasiak. Stasiak hooks Twizted Youth and DDT/Reverse pancake combo drives him down to the canvas. Stasiak scoops up Youth and running powerslam sending him down. Stasiak grabs Youth and seated full nelson. Stasiak is pushing back on the hold and Youth submits, giving the win to Stasiak and Sanders.

Mike Sanders and Shawn Stasiak defeated Twizted Youth and Fernado Romero Entonio Dominic when Stasiak made T. Youth submit to a full nelson in 0:02:06.
Rating: -* 3/4

Stasiak and Sanders get the win and they leave the ring with the victory. Pierre Marquette enters the ring and stomps away at Twizted Youth. Pierre whips Twizted Youth into the ropes and lifts him up and DOWN with a vicious spinebuster. Pierre trash talks Twizted Youth. This war between the French Revolution and the Backyard Dudes is far from over.

NAWA Glory 12/11/03: Wheel of Misfortune of Terror

Dan Marion is standing by the wheel.

Marion: Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my unfortunate duty to announce the latest match in the feud that never dies, The Backyard Dudes and the French Revolution. Now since none of these five men have the mental compacity to figure out how this wheel works, I shall spin it.

Marion spins the wheel and it lands on...Pinata Scramble Challenge? Of course the most idiotic match on the wheel is for the most idiotic match of the night.

Marion: Ladies and Gentlemen I shall explain the rules for this match. Each team with have a pinata, they must hang from a pole from the two neutral corners. This is Tornado Rules because let's face it, chaos may make this match slightly more interesting and raise it from crap to slightly crap. And each man will get a big stick to whack each other with to prevent their opponents from hanging their pinata. That's it I believe.

We see the poles from the ring and we have a table out the outside of the ring which has the pinatas. One of the pinatas is colorful, that would be the Backyard Dudes' pinata. One of them is black and white and quite evil looking, that is the pinata of the French Revolution.

The Evil French Horn Theme of Death plays and out comes the French Revolution. Pierre Marquette and Lord Napoleon are going to competing in this match. Jacques Strap is not here this evening, something to do about getting his head stuck in a toilet or something like that. The referee presents the big wooden sticks the the French Revolution, they can use these in this match to prevent the Backyard Dudes from hanging their pinata from one of those poles.

"The Backyard Dudez Paradize, LOL" plays and out comes the Backyard Dudes. Twizted Youth and F.R.E.D come out to the ring. F.R.E.D has a cooler of something. F.R.E.D enters the ring and Twizted Youth runs around the ring like a goofball. F.R.E.D gets handed his stick and the referee tosses the stick to Twizted Youth. The bell rings and this match is underway.

Pinata Scramble Challenge:
The French Revolution vs the Backyard Dudes

Lord Napoleon rushes F.R.E.D and taps him lightly on the foot with the big stick. F.R.E.D bounces up in the air and clutches his leg. Nappy grabs the leg and drops an elbow down on it. F.R.E.D responds by selling the leg that didn't get hit. Pierre Marquette is to the outside but Twizted Youth has his stick and he twirls it and accidentally whacks himself in the face. Twizted Youth throws his stick at Pierre and Three Stooges Eye Poke, well in theory, as he got no where near the eyes and he poked air about six inches to the side of the head. Pierre sells anyway and Twizted Youth climbs to the apron. Youth does a moonsault of some sort but he misses completely, nearly breaking his neck. Lord Napoleon goes for an elbow but F.R.E.D ducks. F.R.E.D reaches into his tights and pulls out the red blanket. F.R.E.D waves it at Nappy, yelling: "Torro, Torro, Torro" Napoleon charges like an idioit and he hits the pole. F.R.E.D reaches into the pants of Napoleon and GIVES HIM A WEDGIE!

Napoleon clutches his back in pain from that deadly wedgie but Pierre Marquette has his pinata and he attempts to climb up the pull but F.R.E.D throws the blanket over the head of Pierre. Pierre stumbles around, trips, and falls off the pole. F.R.E.D waits on Napoleon to come around and SPITS SALSA IN HIS EYES. A little salsa mist to the eyes of Napoleon. Twizted Youth swings the stick and misses completely. F.R.E.D reaches into his cooler and pulls out a burrito. Napoleon is on the floor and he grabs the pinata of the Backyard Dudes. He can't see do to getting salsa in his eyes. Napoleon is climbing the pole and Pierre is trying to inform him of his mistake but F.R.E.D crouches down behind the back of Pierre and TWIZTED YOUTH SHOVES HIM OVER THE BACK. F.R.E.D stuffs the burrito into the mouth of Pierre to shut him up and Napoleon hangs the wrong pinata, giving the Backyard Dudes the win.

Pinata Scramble Challenge:
Twisted Youth and Fernado Romero Entonio Dominic defeated Pierre Marquette and Lord Napoleon in 0:03:33.
Rating: -**

Pierre has the stick. WHACK TO F.R.E.D. WHACK TO TWIZTED YOUTH. Pierre picks up Twizted Youth and tosses him to the floor. Pierre puts Twizted Youth on the table at ringside and elbow to the chest. Pierre puts F.R.E.D in a rear waistlock and drops him onto the chest of Twizted Youth and onto the table, which doesn't break. Pierre shrugs and just walks off.

(This may be behind the Scaffold Match and the Backyard Wrestling Match in terms of epic greatness.)

NAWA Glory 12/18/03:

The remaining two Backyard Dudes are backstage.

F.R.E.D: Si

Twizted Youth: LOL

F.R.E.D: Si

Twizted Youth: WTF

F.R.E.D: Si.

Twizted Youth: OMG

F.R.E.D: Si

Twizted Youth: L33t.

F.R.E.D: Si

Twizted Youth: XTREME!111

F.R.E.D: Si

Twizted: YOUR MOM!!11

F.R.E.D: Si

Twizted Youth: OMG, LOL, WTF

F.R.E.D: Si, Si, Si. Coja esta mierda, este promo no tiene ningún sentido.

Twizted Youth: XTREME11!!!

With that we fade out. That was productive indeed.

NAWA StarClash 03

"The French Horn Theme" plays and out comes Jacques Strap along with Lord Napoleon. Lord Napoleon is waving the French Flag. Tonight on Pay Per View, Jacques Strap will make his NAWA singles debut against Fernando Romero Entonio Dominic, AKA F.R.E.D. Jacques Strap enters the ring as Lord Napoleon waves the French Flag to boos from the crowd.

"The Mexican Hat Dance" plays and out comes F.R.E.D. F.R.E.D looks like an idiot as usual with that oversized sombero on. F.R.E.D enters the ring, taking the sombero off and the bell rings kicking off this abmonation of a match.

Fernado Romero Entonio Dominic vs Jacques Strap(w/Lord Napoleon)

Both men circle each other. There is not going to much wrestling in this match. I daresay the first person who makes contact of any kind will win this match. F.R.E.D pulls out that red blanket. Oh come on, only a complete idiot would go for something like this. Olay, Olay, the blanket is waved and Jacques Strap charges to the blanket but F.R.E.D pulls it up at the last second and Jacques Strap falls to the floor. Lord Napoleon enters the ring and guts F.R.E.D with the flagpole before tossing him to the outside. The referee is looking right at this and doesn't give enough of a damn to call for the disqualification. Lord Napoleon rolls to the outside and DDT on the floor to F.R.E.D. The referee makes the fatest ten count on record and no one wins this match. What a waste of nearly a minute of Pay Per View time!

Fernado Romero Entonio Dominic and Jacques Strap battled to a double countout in 0:00:46.
Rating: -*

Both these wrestlers are dragged from the ringside area, as this match is over.

(OMG-LOL-WTF)

We are on location to Twizted Youth's mom's backyard. Pierre Marquette is waiting for Twizted Youth to come into the backyard. There is a referee for this match, if you can believe it. Twizted Youth is in the neighbor's yard and he takes a running start, leaping onto the fence.

Backyard Wrestling Rules Match:
Pierre Marquette vs Twizted Youth

Twizted Youth leaps off the fence towards Pierre Marquette and manages to actually make contact, sending Pierre Marquette staggering down to the grass. Twizted Youth drags Pierre Marquette towards the badly constructed ring, made of clothesline wire and a stained gym mat. Twizted Youth tosses Pierre into that poore excuse of a ring. Twizted Youth yells: "LOL" before leaping over the clothesline wire and tripping, falling face first onto the stained gym mat. Pierre is up and he blasts Twizted Youth with a punch. Pierre fires another punch towards Youth. Another punch bounces off the face of Twizted Youth. Pierre tosses Twizted Youth to the ring and TWIZTED YOUTH LANDS FACEFIRST ONTO THE SIDEWALK. Twizted Youth looks at the camera and botches blading on camera, so in grand tradition of poor wrestling, he repeats the spot, on camera.

Pierre leaps to the outside of the ring and goes through the weeds, pulling out...a pooper scooper. I kid you not. Pierre raises the pooper scooper over his head and smashes it down across the back of Twizted Youth! Pierre blasts Twizted Youth in the face with a punch. Another punch bounces off the face of Twizted Youth. A third punch to the face of Twizted Youth. Pierre jabs Twizted Youth in the throat with the handle of the pooper scooper, causing him to fall backwards. Pierre lifts up Twizted Youth and throws him facefirst into the fence. Pierre fires a kick to the midsection. Another kick and Twizted Youth is doubled over, bleeding badly from that horrible blade job. Another kick to the midsection and Twizted Youth is on dream street. Pierre walks over to the shed and opens it up pulling out a...weedwhacker.

Pierre Marquette turns on the weedwhacker and that is dangerously close to the groin of Twizted Youth but TWIZTED YOUTH KICKS PIERRE IN THE GROIN CAUSING HIM TO DROP THE WEEDWHACKER. Twizted Youth picks up the weedwhacker and CUTS INTO THE FOREHEAD OF PIERRE WITH THE WEEDWHACKER. Thankfully the blades are plastic but never the less, Pierre blades on camera. Shot over the back with the weedwhacker. Another shot over the back with the weedwhacker and Twizted Youth is on a roll. Twizted Youth climbs up to the fence and attempts to do an Undertaker rope walk on the fence but he slips and falls crotch first onto the fence. Pierre climbs up the fence and attempts to hook Twizted Youth for a superplex. This is illegal in this match since it is a wrestling move! TWIZTED YOUTH SHOVES PIERRE MARQUETTE OFF THE FENCE. He lands on a pile of dog poop! THE POOP, THE POOP, GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY, THE POOP!

Pierre looks disgusted as his back is covered in dog poop. Twizted Youth is poised and WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT! That is some kind of bastardized flippy thing off the fence. Just what in the hell was he going for. It seems like Twizted Youth barely connected with Pierre Marquette on that one. Twizted Youth is going for the cover. One, Two, Pierre Marquette manages to kick out. Twizted Youth goes to the shed and pulls out a shovel. Twizted Youth takes a running start with the shovel and NEARLY DECAPITATES PIERRE MARQUETTE WITH A BOTCHED SHOVEL LEGDROP! Pierre looks like he is on dream street with that botched move! Twizted Youth makes the cover. One, Two, the referee stops the count and grabs Pierre arm rolling it up as it appears that Pierre has been knocked silly with that botched move.

Twizted Youth lifts up Pierre Marquette and running start. TWIZTED YOUTH THROWS PIERRE MARQUETTE HEADFIRST INTO THE SHED! Pierre falls back, clutching his already concussed head. Twizted Youth reaches into the shed and pulls out an old door. Twizted Youth grabs a pair of saw horses and tosses them into the yard. Twizted Youth puts the door on the two saw horses, making a makeshift table. Twizted Youth lifts up Pierre Marquette and tosses him onto the table. Twizted Youth pulls out a ladder and climbs up it. Twizted Youth is on the ladder and HE TRIPS, FALLING OFF AND LANDING FACEFIRST ONTO A PICNIC TABLE. Pierre reaches into his pants and pulls out a pair of brass knuckles. Pierre swings the knuckles and SHOT TO THE FACE OF TWIZTED YOUTH. Pierre rears back and decks Twizted Youth with the knuckles once again. Pierre picks up Twizted Youth and tosses him into the fence. Pierre lifts up Twizted Youth and SPINEBUSTER! Pierre covers but the referee doesn't make the count as that is a wrestling move.

Pierre picks up the weedwhacker and turns it on. Pierre rushes Twizted Youth with it but Youth trips him up and PIERRE GETS CROTCHED ON THE WEEDWHACKER! Pierre is in a lot of pain, blues, and agony from that move! Twizted Youth walks over and grabs a light tube. Twizted Youth fires a shot over the back of Pierre Marquette, which was as week as hell. Another weak shot over the back of Pierre Marquette and Twizted Youth just shrugs when the light tube doesn't break and tosses it to the side. Twizted Youth pulls out the ladder and climbs up the side of the house. Twizted Youth is facing away from Pierre Marquette and Pierre falls down. Twizted Youth leaps off and HE MISSES THE TWIZTED PERCEPTION OFF THE HOUSE BY ABOUT TEN FEET. He wasn't even close to connecting. The referee pulls Twizted Youth on top of Pierre Marquette and makes the count. One, Two, Three. Twizted Youth is your winner.

Twizted Youth pinned Pierre Marquette after with the Twizted Perception in 0:04:59 .
Rating: -* 1/4

Twizted Youth pulls himself up and Pierre Marquette is up and he is not looking too happy. Twizted Youth's mom walks out of the house, looking suspiciously like F.R.E.D. in drag, but that can't be right as this match is live and F.R.E.D just wrestled a match back at the arena. Plus if it was pre-taped, don't you think we would edit out all the bad spots leaving this match with a grand total of...nothing. F.R.E.D er I mean Twizted Youth's mother rushes Pierre and clotheslines him down. Pierre decides to run away. This feud will continue unfortunately.

(And that closes out 2003, but the feud continues in 2004)