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Fantasy Wrestling Circuit
| Unright | Posted on 10/06/06 at 03:32:33 A graphic pops on screen ----- The Following is a presentation of Unright's Fantasy Wrestling Circuit. ----- Bill "The Shill" McGill comes out and grabs a microphone. BM: Boy and girls... ladies and gentlemen... Welcome to Fantasy Wrestling Circuit! We're happy to be here tonight in Fairvale, California! <cheap pop> Boy, are we glad to be here... Boy, do we have a show for you! Tonight! Our opening match! We've got... A former WWE champion... versus! A legend from TNA! <crowd gets excited> Tonight! You! Will! Be! Getting! Your money's worth! This will be a show for the ages and this opening match will go down in history as one of the greatest of all time! Without further adooooo... You guys really are a great crowd. I've so happy to be here---- FORMER WWE CHAMPION! PETE GAS! Audioslave's "Gasoline" brings out Pete Gas and technically Bill "The Shill" is correct, Pete Gas is a former WWE Hardcore champion, but then again so was one of the Godfather's Hos, so it's not that impressive an honor. The crowd starts to voice their annoyance in the form of mass booing. BM: ...And his opponent. One of TNA's most valuable stars... Know for tearing up the tag division with few equals. He is undisputedly recognized as a Legend in this sport. He is... Joe E. LEGEND! The Offspring's "Come Out and Play" brings out Joe E. Legend to some more boos from the crowd. They don't appreciate being misled... especially this cheaply. Legend soaks up the boos as if they were cheers and does the Jarrett strut just to piss people off more. vs. Joe E. Legend The bell rings and Gas charges at Legend and softly clotheslines him. Legend gingerly takes his time falling down. Gas drops an elbow, missing Legend by a good foot and a half, but Legend sells it anyways! Gas goes up top the ropes... wait... Legend is not of position. Gas directs him to shuffle a bit more to the left. There we go. Legend lifts his foot and Gas jumps and lands, and then knocks his head softly against Legend's foot. Legend is back up and takes a full soda to the back of the head! The crowd is chanting "Bullshit!" and the ref is starting to look nervous as garbage starts to hit the ring. "The Call of Ktulu" by Metallica suddenly blares out and two huge figures make their way out of the locker room. vs Prankstas (Joe E. Legend & Pete Gas) w/Bill "The Shill" McGill Legend and Gas try to rush the two big men, but they get knocked down with a couple of huge clotheslines. Those are followed up with some stereo big splashes. They pick up the Prankstas and ohh... Stereo Samoan drops! Typhoon and Viscera take a moment to soak in the cheers from the crowd. Viscera kicks Legend out of the ring as Typhoon goes to take on Gas only to have Gas give him a low blow! Gas and Legend recover a bit and Typhoon becomes the face-in-peril. Viscera eventually gets the hot tag and hits the Embalmer on Pete Gas for the 3-count. Behemoths (Typhoon and Viscera) defeated Prankstas (Joe E. Legend and Pete Gas) when Viscera pinned P. Gas with the Embalmer in 8:39. Rating: * Bill "The Shill" gathers his charges and heads towards the back. Meanwhile Typhoon grabs a microphone. T: Yeah, that's what you guys get for trying to bullshit the fans with your bullshit. The FWC is for real wrestlers who know how to give real ass-kickings! You try that shit again and we'll be right to hand your asses to you again! Eff Dub See! Eff Dub See! The crowd only lacklusterly chants along. Typhoon and Viscera pose a bit longer before we cut to some pre-recorded comments from "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown. MB: Out from the Serengeti comes the most dominant predator of alllll time! Listen, when I got the call from FWC, they didn't ask, they begged The Alpha Male to come here. They said 'Please Monty Brown, without The Alpha Male all we have on the roster is women and pansies. We need a real superstar here.' Well, I checked my schedule and it turns out I have some free time. So I came down here and they put in a match with King Nothing Booker T. Booker, there's only one King of the Jungle and you're looking at him! And Kip James? Man, what time is it? Oh, it's has-been o'clock. Both of you better get your shit together, because you're both about feel... the... POOOOOOOUNNNNNNNNNNNNCEE! ............ Period!" "Readyfuels" by Anberlin brings out "Straight Up" Mikey Batts. This young star has unlimited potential. He takes the time to go around the ring shaking hands with almost every fan around ringside before flipping over the ropes into the ring. Stereomud's "Pain" plays and Cham-Pain slowly walks out and lifts his arms to a few cheers himself. This guy has been around the independent circuit more than a few times and has earned his respect with the fans. He steps into the ring and shakes hands with Mikey. vs. Cham-Pain Pain uses his experience to ground Batts at first, taking him down with simple takedown maneuvers and slapping on submission holds to try to wear him down. Mikey breaks out a couple of times and hits a move or two to show what he can do, but Pain is quick to ground him again. Cham Pain is really controlling the pace of the match. Pain continues with a sound strategy of slowly escalating the risk and damage of his moves while concentrating on Batts' lower back. Pain starts getting cocky though as he goes to the top rope. Batts jumps at the ring ropes and Pain gets crotched! Batts goes up with him and nails a top-rope huricanrana that sends Pain all the way down to the thin mats outside the ring!! Batts tosses Pain into the ring steps and the guardrail a few times. He jumps up on the apron and hits a moonsaults onto Pain! Back in the ring, Pain catches Batts with in a front face lock and holds it to try to catch his breath. Batts lifts Pain over in a Northern Lights attempt, but gets a 2 count on the bridged pin attempt. Pain lifts Batts and brings him down with his version of inverted DDT that he calls the Pain Killer! 1... 2... Kickout! A frustrated Pain bangs the mat and argues with the referee. He finally picks up Batts and sends him to the turnbuckles; he tries to follow in, but Batts catches his head with his feet. He twists and sends Pain to the mat with a spinning headscissors! Pin one.... two.... three! Kickout! He got it! Batts wins! Mikey Batts pinned Cham-Pain after spinning headscissors in 12:58. Rating: *** Batts barely got the three count and he's ecstatic! He jumps around and does a lap around the ring, slapping hands before going back in. Cham-Pain grudgingly shakes hands again and lifts Mikey's hand in victory! What sportsmanship! Keep an eye on that Mikey Batts. We cut to the backstage area where we see Buck Quartermain shadowboxing. He stops and faces the camera. BQ: Look, I'm not going to say a catchphrase. I'm not going to be funny or clever. I'm going to get in that ring and wrestle because that's what I do and I good it pretty damn good. Interview's over. The camera transitions to a shot of "The Englishman" James Mason. JM: I rarely do this, but I must congratulate a few decent American chaps. They had the excellent idea of bringing me here to add some much needed class to this armpit of a circuit. I am, of course, The Englishman James Mason. If you don't recognize me, that's because you live out of a trailer and can't afford satellite reception in order to get some decent British television programming. It's a terribly difficult task, but I will try to force some culture into you all for your own good. Back to the ring into time for the next match! The Hives "Hate to Say I Told You So" brings out Buck Quartermain in black shorts and black boots. He doesn't stop to shake hands; he's focused on business tonight. "London Calling" by The Clash brings out "The Englishman" James Mason. He's wearing some purple trunks with a Union Jack on them. He spits at the outstretched hand of an audience member. L7's "Shitlist" introduces Brute, a 7 foot, 320 lbs behemoth. He's wearing a pair of jeans, a dirty black t-shirt with a few holes in it, and a nasty sneer. vs "The Englishman" James Mason vs Brute Both Mason and Quartermain looked at each other, and then at Brute, who stands over a foot taller and 100 lbs than either of them. They nod to each other and charge Brute. They manage to take him down and stomp on him a bit, but Brute suddenly sits up Undertaker-style and shoves them away. Brute gets up and his ring strategy becomes clear. He concentrates his attacks on Mason and repeatedly pitches Quartermain over the top rope. When Quartermain does manage to attack Brute, he goes after the right knee. They finally they catch a break as Brute goes down and clutches his right knee after Quartermain clips him. As Brute is down, Mason gets the brilliant idea to attack Quartermain. Brute recovers, grabs Mason, hits the Flatline DDT, and then does the same to Quartermain. He pins Mason for the win. What a monster! Triangle Match: Brute defeated Buck Quartermain and James Mason when Brute pinned J. Mason with the Flatline DDT in 8:00. Rating: ** 1/4 Back in the locker room, the rookie Mikey Batts is celebrating his first victory in FWC with Steven Richards, Jody Fleisch, and Nigel McGuinness. Beers are being passed around when suddenly the seven foot monster known as Brute walks in. Everyone immediately goes quiet. B: What's this? A victory celebration? Well, I won my match too, so gimme a beer. He snatches Mikey Batts' beer and shotguns it, crushes the can, and then leaves. Batts looks miffed, but his friends are quick to talk him out of doing anything. We jump now to some pre-recorded comments from Brother Devon. BD: Steven Richards? You may see yourself as some sort of hardcore wrestler, but I know you well... You're nothing but a hardcore sinner! The time has come for you to face some righteous redemption! Testify! We come back to in ring just in time to see Steven Richards and Victoria comes out to Stone Temple Pilot's "Sex Type Thing". They play up to the crowd. Woven Hand's version of "Ain't No Sunshine" plays on the PA as Brother Devon makes his way to the ring, decked out in some priestly robes. vs Brother Devon Richards takes control out of the starting gate, but after dropping Devon with the Stevie-T, he celebrates a bit too long with Victoria. Devon bows his head in prayer as he sneaks up behind Richards. When Richards turns around, Devon yells HALLELUYAH! And delivers a mighty head butt that sends Richards over the top rope! The strangeness continues as Devon negates Victoria's interference outside by laying his hands on her forehead and pronouncing her 'healed'. Victoria collapses and stays unconscious the rest of the match. Back in the ring, Richards takes control again, concentrating his attacks on Devon's head, he even busts him open hard way with a vicious back elbow. A couple of Steven-Kicks have Devon dead on the mat. Richards picks up his first win in FWC. Steven Richards pinned Brother Devon after the Steven Kick in 9:45. Rating: ** [Victoria interfered against Brother Devon.] Richards wakes up Victoria and the head to the back while the trainers check on Devon. We cut to Kip James sitting in a VIP room on a leather couch with Alicia Webb sitting on his lap. The cameraman has interrupted them and Alicia looks really annoyed. KJ: Sorry babe, I've got to do this thing real quick. Kip turns to the camera. KJ: Look, some people in the back office feel that I need to remind everyone who I am. Well, I don't need to. Everybody already knows who I am, I'm Kip James, bitch! I don't need to mention my impressive history, like that time I won the King of the Ring, or my Intercontinental Title reign, and I really don't need to mention my record as a ten time World Tag Team champ. People already know I'm no fluke. It doesn't matter whether it's the past, the present, or the future; it all belongs to the G-Man, Kip James. Now, go on... Get! James shoos the cameraman out and slams the door in (our) face. The camera does a transition over to Jody Fleisch and Nigel McGuinness, The New British Era. JF: A lot of Americans don't know this, but the British are just as passionate about professional wrestling as they are. Both Nigel and I have been making a name for ourselves in our home country, but now it's time to send over another British Invasion. This time instead of some fab music, you're going to witness some ass-kicking, courtesy of myself, Jody Fleisch, and my partner, Nigel McGuinness, collectively known as the New British Era! NM: Our first Read and Write is against Bo-le Of Glue burritos. They daan't stand a chance. We're garn ter 'it them so 'ard they'll be scramblin' Hammer and Tack to where dey came fro. Back to the ring, we see that tonight's ref is none other than Owen Hart! WTF? I guess anything really is possible in the Fantasy Wrestling Circuit. "Eres una puta" by Los Ilegales plays and Stacy Keibler is out leading Silver King and Jose Maximo to the ring. "Roll On" by The Living End announces the arrival of Nigel McGuinness along with his wife Tina McGuinness along with "The Phoenix" Jody Fleisch. They are pumped and ready to go! vs New British Era (Jody Fleisch & Nigel McGuinness) w/ Tina McGuinness Maximo gets some early offense, but Fleisch quickly reverses a Quesedora attempt into a face slam and the New British Era show off a few double teaming maneuvers as Jose is solidly cut off from his corner. Stacy Keibler trips Nigel as he went for the Artful Dodger and that gives Jose enough time to tag in the Silver King. He manages to a bit of damage to McGuinness with moves like a perfectly executed somersault senton, but Nigel stiffly punches the momentum back into his favor and soon enough NBE are unleashing some more double maneuvers only this time on Silver King! Stacy has seen enough and she jumps up on the apron and gives McGuinness a low blow from behind. Owen Hart goes over to tell Stacy that he saw that and he won't hesitate to DQ them if she does that again. King tags out to Maximo who tries to hit his Skull Driver, but Nigel blocks it and gets a hot tag to Jody! The Phoenix hops over the ropes, whoops; he tripped over the top rope and fell flat on his face. We'll just edit that out of the DVD later on. Anyways, jump cut to Los Ilegales stomping the crap out of Jody. Silver King puts Fleisch on his shoulders and Jose leaps off the top turnbuckle and delivers a Flying DDT! Oh My! Los Ilegales show off a few more double team moves before Fleisch manages to make a hot tag to Nigel! Divorce Court for Jose! He pulls Silver King into the ring and drops him with a Tower of London! Guvna's Crumpet to Jose! Pinfall 1.... 2.... T—Ooo... Stacy Keibler just gouged Nigel's eyes with her sharp nails. Owen's seen enough, he calls for the bell. Los Ilegales are disqualified! Match with Special Referee Owen Hart New British Era (Jody Fleisch and Nigel McGuinness) defeated Los Ilegales (Jose Maximo and Silver King) when N. McGuinness defeated King by disqualification in 11:05. Rating: ** [Stacy Keibler interfered against Nigel McGuinness.] Nigel and Jody have a celebratory hug before leaving early, slapping hands with the crowds at ringside. Stacy Keibler and her Los Ilegales team stay behind to question Owen Hart on his decision. Owen does some clear pantomiming of the infractions committed by Stacy. Things start to get heated until Stacy drops to her knees and nails Owen with a low blow. Silver King and Maximo are quick to follow that up with a massive beat down. They punch and kick Hart until he's curled up the fetal position. They pick him and blast him with a chair a few times before putting him up on the top turnbuckle for the Spanish Fly! A double moonsault uranage! Stacy has grabbed a microphone in the meanwhile. SK: Listen up New British Era! My boys want another match, this time with a real referee, not some has-been washed up wrestler who plays sides. With a real unbiased ref, we'll show you losers who the better team is. Let's cut to the backstage area where we have Warlord with The Baron standing by. TB: You know, as I'm watching these matches, I see a lot of pansy weight losers. Nobody that has the sheer size, the sheer strength, the sheer physique, the sheer power of this man right here, Warlord! W: SOON.... YOU... SHALL... SUFFFEERRRRRRRRRR!! Both laugh maniacally as the camera cuts back to the ring. "War Pigs" by Black Sabbath plays and Warlord, decked out in his ridiculous gear, comes out accompanied by the Baron. "Ninja Gaiden - Mineshaft" by The Advantage plays and a man dressed in full ninja garb jumps out from underneath the ring and pops in the ring behind Warlord and The Baron. vs Hardcore Ninja Warlord tries to grab Ninja, but the stealthy assassin dodges the big man causing him to get frustrated. Ninja peppers Warlord with some strikes and kicks, but Warlord manages to catch Ninja's arm and pull him into a bearhug. Ninja gives a couple of Mongolian chops to break out and quickly exits the ring. Warlord gives chase, but is stopped when Ninja hides behind The Baron. The Baron stomps on Ninja's foot and ducks out of the way as Warlord charges in with a clothesline. Warlord slams Ninja hard into the ringpost then locks in the Full Nelson on the outside. As the ref's count gets high, he throws Ninja into the ring, drops a leg on him, and gets the win. Warlord pinned Hardcore Ninja after a legdrop in 5:54. Rating: 3/4* We cut to Owen Hart sitting in the back of an ambulance bus. He's got a nasty black eye and some purple bruises on his face, neck, and chest. He puts on icepack on his face and looks at the camera. OH: Stacy Keibler and those illegal fucks want a war? I'll bring the war to them. They think I'm a has-been? I'll show them that I'm better right now then they'll ever be. But first, I need to get in touch with a friend who loves to kick ass. The came cuts to some pre-recorded comments from "King" Booker T and "Queen" Sharmell. QS: ALL HAIL KING BOOKER! ALL HAIL KING BOOKER! ALL HAIL KING BOOKER! BT: That's right! The FWC may be just beginning, but already they are blessed with the presence of the true King of all wrestling, King Booker. Unfortunately, we have to sully my royal hands by wrestling that rapscallion Kip James and that savage, Monty Brown. Truly they are undeserving of being in the ring with me. A King does need to prove himself against those lesser than him. But if we must, then they will be on the wrong side of a royal ass-whuppin'! We cut to a highlight video plays detailing the history behind our next two performers: Rey Misterio and Johnny Devine. The video starts with the glory days they had together until Misterio accidentally broke Devine's brother's collarbone in a freak in-ring accident. Devine blamed Misterio and eventually ended up stealing his wife. The two have been fighting in WGW (World's Greatest Wrestling (no, really!)) for months, and although the feud is kind of winding down, WGW was grateful enough to lend them to us for another match on our debut card. "Booyaka 619" by Rey Misterio & Mad One plays through the arena and out walks Rey Misterio to a monstrous pop from the crowd. "Name of the Game" by Crystal Method plays and out comes "Hotshot" Johnny Devine to more than a few boos. vs "Hot Shot" Johnny Devine Special WGW Grudge Match Devine is quick to take the fight to Misterio, but Misterio is quick with the reversals. In fact, the first 3 fast-paced minutes neither wrestler gets any serious offense in as just about every move is countered. These two know each other well! Devine finally gets frustrated and just punches Misterio in the face. Rey wasn't expecting that and goes down like a sack of potatoes. Devine takes control at that point and does some pretty sadistic damage to Misterio's right knee. Rey is soon hobbling and Johnny keeps up the pressure, but missed a plancha to the outside! Misterio gets time to recover and soon starts fighting back using submission holds and his knee is still bothering him. Devine eventually manages to give a vicious kick to Misterio's knee to gain back in control. He goes for the Devine Intervention, but he misses! Misterio is quick to capitalize, delivering the West Coast Pop for the sudden win! Special Grudge Match for WGW: Rey Misterio pinned Johnny Devine with the West Coast Pop in 7:43. Rating: ** 1/2 The Harlem Heat Theme (Royal Remix) plays and "King" Booker T, accompanied, of course, by his wife "Queen" Sharmell. They're taking this royalty gimmick to the hilt with robes, scepters, and crowns. A few fans reach out for him, but Booker flinches back disgusted. The Black Keys "Set You Free" brings out "The G-Man" Kip James and Alicia Webb. James is decked out in a black t-shirt that reads "You Know Who I Am" and some purple wrestling shorts with "G-Man" written on the back, while Alicia is wearing a rather sophisticated black gown. James struts to the ring without much of a care and he barely acknowledges Booker as he steps up on the second rope of the turnbuckle to pose for the fans. Alicia looks defiantly across the ring at Sharmell who returns the glare. Finally, Disturbed's "Down with the Sickness" brings out "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown. Wearing only his leopard print trunks and boots he sprints down to the ring and starts immediately attacking Kip James. vs. "The G-Man" Kip James w/ Alicia Webb vs "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown Monty charges at James, but James manages to fight him off with some brawling before tagging in Booker. Booker continues pounding down Monty, but he makes the mistake of throwing Monty to the ropes, Monty returns with a POUNCE! That knocks Booker clear out of the ring! Sharmell tends to Booker but Kip James is there to grab Booker and toss him back in. Monty tags out and James goes on the attack only to discover that Booker has recovered enough to defend himself. A couple of chops have James reeling, Booker charges in only to receive a massive belly-to-belly suplex! James and Monty continue to work over Booker until James tries for a pin and Monty quickly breaks it up. Monty powerslams Booker down, but this time James breaks the pin. Brown and James confront each other and begin exchanging right hands. Brown takes control and he starts really doing some damage to Kip James' back. The ref takes a bump and that's all the excuse Booker needs to jump in the ring and waffle both his opponents with a steel chair! Alicia decides to attack Sharmell outside the ring and that distracts Booker from his attack. This allows Monty to POUNCE Booker into his chair into the turnbuckle. As he stumbles back, he leans over and James nails the Famouser! Booker is out! Brown and James confront each other again, this time Kip gets knocked out of the ring. Monty follows and eventually both heavyweights end up over the barricade and brawling among the fans. James chokes out Monty on the metal railing, before tossing him into a row of chairs. Monty comes back, but stops short. The ref is up and counting them out! They both charge back to the ring, making it back just in time. Booker delivers a Houston Sidekick on James, and a hook kick on Monty. He goes for a pin on Brown, but Brown kicks out. Booker picks Brown and plants him with a belly-to-belly suplex. James is up, but Booker sidekicks him out of the ring. Booker cinches in a reverse chinlock and every basically gets a breather at this point. Alicia kelps Kip recover and he takes his time getting back in the ring. Booker eyes him carefully, but Kip just encourages the chinlock. He asks if he can kick Monty in the head. Booker smiles and agrees. Boot to the head! Booker says again! Another boot to the head! Booker is enjoying this, he calls for another one. Kip rears back and nails Booker with a vicious roundhouse kick! James delivers some kneedrops to both Brown and Booker. He then picks up Booker and drops him with a cobra clutch slam. He picks up Monty and looks like he going for a pumphandle, but Monty hulks up and starts unleashing some mighty chops. Booker gets up, but Monty grabs him and sends him over the top rope to the outside! James staggers back, and Monty drills him to the mat with a double underhook suplex! Pin! 1... 2... Foot on the ropes! The Alpha Male picks him back up and hits the Alpha Bomb! Pin! 1... 2... Weak kickout! Monty is feeling victory. Monty sends Kip into the ropes where he collides with Booker who was standing on the apron! As James stumbles back, Monty gets ready for the POUNCE! But wait, Alicia Webb grabs Monty's foot! Monty takes a moment to cuss her out, and then turns around into a kick to the midsection. James rears back... FAMOUSER! Pin! 1.... 2.... 3! Out of nowhere, Kip James wins! Main Event: Kip James defeated Booker T and Monty Brown when K. James pinned M. Brown with the Famouser in 17:09. Rating: *** [Alicia Webb interfered against Monty Brown.] Booker has a great expression of confusion and disgust over the fact that Kip James won the match. We get a staredown as the video fades out. FWC © Unright Production ------------- Note: "Huh? A opening tag team match, a triangle match main event? What original booking! I wonder if he'll have a mini-Round Robin next card" Yeah, yeah.. I know. It's the good ol' ROH ruleset. I'm hoping to make up for that by bringing the characters to life and deviating enough from it to keep everyone guessing. Starting roster Faces 6'3" 256lbs Booker T w/ Sharmell 5'10" 212 lbs "Iceman" Buck Quartermain 5'10" 207 lbs Cham-Pain 5'6" 168 lbs Hardcore Ninja 5'5" 154 lbs "The Phoenix" Jody Fleisch 5'8" 170 lbs "Straight Up" Mikey Batts 6'1" 220 lbs Nigel McGuinness w/Tina McGuinness 6'2" 220 lbs Steven Richards w/Victoria 6'3" 384 lbs Typhoon 6'9" 485 lbs Viscera Heels 6'1" 275 lbs Brother Devon 6'10" 320 lbs Brute 5'10" 209 lbs "The Englishman" James Mason 6'4" 252 lbs Joe E. Legend w/Bill The Shill 5'9" 190 lbs Jose Maximo 6'4" 268 lbs "The G-Man" Kip James w/Alicia Webb 6'1" 267 lbs "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown 6'4" 265 lbs Pete Gas w/Bill The Shill 5'9" 217 lbs Silver King w/ Stacy Keibler 6'3" 323 lbs Warlord w/The Baron |
| Justin | Posted on 10/07/06 at 23:39:13Note: "Huh? A opening tag team match, a triangle match main event? What original booking! I wonder if he'll have a mini-Round Robin next card"Hey I thought it was a pretty good opening card. And the ROH ruleset is flexable enough to deviate & have some fun at the same time as giving the characters a life of their (your) own. I'm gonna be watching for this one often. |
| Unright | Posted on 10/24/06 at 04:27:01 The following words appear on-screen: The wording fades to show the POV of someone on the receiving end of a Monty Brown Pounce. Fade to FWC's logo: -------------------------------------------------- Fantasy Wrestling Circuit -- 2nd Show! -------------------------------------------------- Cut to ringside. The Royal Remix of the Booker T theme brings out "King" Booker and "Queen" Sharmell all dressed in the royal regalia. They make their way into the ring and they have microphones. QS: ALL HAIL KING BOOKER! BT: Regicide was committed last month! In this very ring, I was denied my rightful place as the King of FWC, and the most grievous part was that I was not even pinned. Instead that rogue Kip James pinned that mongrel Monty Brown. That's not supposed to happen. We are royally pissed off! If I ever get my royal hands on those Booker T is interrupted by Disturbed's "Down with the Sickness" as "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown comes out. He's got a microphone as well. MB: Oh shut up! All your silly robes and crowns and shit don't mean nothing. It means you're nothing but a grown man playing dress-up. But me, I'm the Alpha Male, baby. I'm the king of the jungle and the ultimate specimen. The day a punk loser like you or Kip James gets a win over me is-- "Set You Free" by The Black Keys cuts off Monty Brown this time as Kip James and a bored looking Alicia Webb make their entrance. They go down to the ring with a third microphone. KJ: Let me stop you right there, "Alpha Male". Mister "King of the Jungle". Maybe you should have Baloo come out and sing you a little song because you seem to have forgotten that I pinned your ass last month right in the middle of the ring. MB: The only thing that means is that it takes two of you to beat one of me. BT: Aw hell no. All it means is that you stole my rightful victory. All three wrestlers get in each others faces while Alicia Webb and Sharmell share a few words as well. Just when it looks like a punch is about to be thrown... Peter Gabriel's "Sledgehammer" plays on the PA and none other than Greg "The Hammer" Valentine dressed in a very classy suit steps out onto the entranceway. He also has a microphone, but he waits for the applause and "Ham-mer" chants to die down first. GV: First of all, all of you calm down. Apparently having all three of you fight each other at the same time solves nothing. Because no matter what happens, you all come out and slow down the show by pissing and moaning about it. Since you all want to prove who is the best, who about you all face each other in one-on-one matchups, like a mini round robin? The crowd gives out a huge cheer as they like this idea. James, Booker, and Brown all nod and get smiles on their faces. GV: Well damn. Glad you're all happy. It starts right now with you Kip James against... you, Alpha Male. Booker T and Sharmell say a few parting words of trash talk as they leave the ring and James and Brown get ready to fight. -vs- "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown They lock up, but Monty's superior strength helps him get the advantage right off the bat as he slams Kip repeatedly with a variety of suplexes. A flapjack with excellent elevation only gets Brown a two count and now James is just swinging wildly. He manages to kick Monty in the midsection and goes for a Famouser, but it's way too early and Monty Brown is way too alert. James leaves the ring, but Monty follow and hits the POUNCE! That sends James rib-first into the guardrail! James is hurting, and Monty spends a lot of time hitting those ribs and stretching out James' midsection. James tries to fight back with cheap tactics like eye pokes and low blows and tries to rally some momentum, but a stiff shot to the ribs puts him right back down. It seems obvious at this point that Monty brown will win. Monty goes to the ropes, but Alicia jabs a steel chair at the back of his head! Ouch! Monty stumbles forward and James hits him with a DDT! Both are down and the ref starts a double count, but James is up first at 8. He hits Brown with some simple offense, but it's ineffective and Monty nails him with another POUNCE out of nowhere for the win. Monty Brown pinned Kip James with the Pounce in 0:11:29. Rating: ** 1/2 [Alicia Webb interfered against Monty Brown.] Monty Brown is up 1-0 in this mini-round robin and some trainers are out to help Kip James back to the locker room. Will he be in shape to fight Booker T later on? We cut to some footage sent in by the New British Era. Nigel McGuinness and Jody Fleisch are sparring in a gym somewhere. Nigel has a dragon sleeper applied, but Jody squirms over and takes down Nigel with a Northern Lights suplex. They get up and shake hands then address the camera. JF: Stacy Keibler, you want to blame a referee for your boys' sorry performance, that's your business. Since me and Nigel are the best team in England, and probably the world, there's no shame in losing to us. But since you want to have another go, let's have it at FWC's second show. To help you out, we'll make it a No DQ match. NM: This will be loike an old fashioned rub-a-dub brawl. I'm warnin' ya though, keep your gooseberry puddin' under control. If she gets involved, then she's part of the bloomin' read and write. We cut good to right now, where we find Mikey Batts wandering the halls backstage when he runs into Steven Richards. MB: Hey Steven, I'm in trouble. I have a tag team match coming up, and my partner can't make it. SR: Whoa, don't look at me. I'm already booked tonight against Joe E. Legend. MB: Shit. SR: What about that guy over there, hiding behind the plant? The camera quickly pans around and catches the Hardcore Ninja badly hidden behind a potted plant. Realizing he's been spotted, he jumps out and strikes a ninja pose. MB: um, Hey ninja dude... Can you team up with me for my match? HN: Dot Dot Dot MB: Okay... I'm gonna go ahead and assume that's some sort of Morse code for yes. C'mon, we're up next. The Clash's "London Calling" brings out The Imperialists, James Mason and Warlord, accompanied by the Baron who is waving a British flag. Mason looks pretty confident with the 320 lbs powerhouse Warlord watching his back. "The Call of Ktulu" by Metallica brings out one of the largest tag teams in wrestling today. At a combined weight of nearly 900lbs, Viscera and Typhoon are the Behemoths! Mikey Batts comes out next to the tune of Anberlin's "Readyfuels" accompanied by the mysterious Hardcore Ninja. Nobody knows much about this guy and the chemistry between Ninja and Batts is likely to be next to nil. -vs- "Straight Up" Mikey Batts & Hardcore Ninja -vs- The Imperialists ("The Englishman" James Mason & Warlord) w/ The Baron Ninja wants to start off against Warlord in an apparent rematch of last week. Ninja peppers him with a hit and run attack, but Warlord soon floors him and tags in Mason who hits a beautiful somersault senton. Batts saves Ninja and drags him to his corner to tag himself in. Batts and Typhoon end up working over Mason together via quick tags before Mason tags out to Typhoon. The previous friendliness is immediately forgotten as Typhoon hits a massive powerslam on Batts for a 2 count. The Baron decides to pulls his team off the apron and hold a conference outside the ring. Without anybody to tag out to, Batts and Ninja take a pretty bad beating at the hands of their much larger opponents. Batts holds his own for a bit, but when Ninja got tagged in, he got quickly pancaked and hits by Viscera's flopping heel kick. x Viscera beat Ninja via a spinning heel kick in 0:05:58 Viscera runs and makes it look like he's going to deliver a suicide dive and the Imperialists scramble. The behemoths share a laugh and point at the Imperialists and make chicken motions. A pissed Warlord jumps in the ring and exchanges with hard punches with Typhoon. They trade slow-plodding momentum back and forth as I realize the most talented person in the match is already eliminated. A really tired Viscera locks in a bearhug on Warlord. Warlord reaches the ropes, but Viscera hangs on way past the 5 count and the ref is forced to call it in favor of the Imperialists. Triangle Match: The Imperialists (James Mason and Warlord) defeated Behemoths (Typhoon and Viscera) and Mikey Batts and Hardcore Ninja: x Viscera beat Ninja via a spinning heel kick in 0:05:58 x Warlord beat Viscera via disqualification in 0:10:58 Rating: 1/4* Backstage, Greg Valentine is on his cell phone walking down the halls when suddenly the 7 foot Brute blocks his path. Valentine goes to walk around him, but Brute moves over to block his path. He hangs up the phone. GV: Alright, I get the point. You want to talk? Walk with me, I'm a busy man. Brute starts walking beside him. B: Why don't I have a match? I trashed two sorry SOBs last month and this month you got nothing for me. I'm not going to be looked over. GV: Brute, you're too damn big to be looked over. Don't worry; people were plenty impressed with your first match. In fact, I was just on the phone with some people designing a belt for us. There's going to be a tournament in a couple of months and I've already penciled your name in. B: Yeah, whatever. I just want to fight, so book me, bookerman. GV: Well, tonight's full... But next month, I guarantee you a match. B: Hmph. I guess that'll have to do. Brute stops Valentine and pushes him against the wall. B: It better be with someone who can put up a fight. Brute stomps off and Valentine looks a little annoyed. "Come Out and Play" brings out Joe E. Legend with Bill "The Shill". Legend tries to slap hands with the fans at ringside, but the crowd backs away from his attempts at touching them. Disgruntled, he enters the ring. "Nitro" plays and Steven Richards and Victoria come out to a strongly positive crowd response. -vs- Steven Richards w/ Victoria Not much to tell on this match. Steven Richards held the upper hand for the strong majority of it. The only notable offense that legend got in was towards the end where Legend reversed a Richards' clothesline attempt with a crucifix, getting a 2 count. He hit a split-legged moonsault for another two count. He then missed an enziguiri and Richards hit the Stevie-T and it was over. Sorry for the short match description, but this was a Richards squash match. Steven Richards pinned Joe E. Legend with the Stevie-T in 0:07:05. Rating: ** 1/4 We cut backstage to Kip James' dressing room where he busy having his ribs taped up. Alicia Webb is with him and dressed to go out. She's got an annoyed look on her face. AW: Kip, baby, do you have to go wrestle again? That jungle guy beat you, so what's the point in fighting again, there's no way you can win. Just let the other two figure it out so we can go clubbing. KJ: I hear ya babe, but I've got a little something called pride fucking with me. I beat both those losers last month at the same time and I've got to prove that it's no fluke. AW: But your ribs are hurt! You could get seriously injured! KJ: Ah, don't worry about that. Look, they've got tape around them; I'm practically as good as new! But God help me if Booker manages to somehow rip off these bandages. AW: ugh... Alicia leaves in disgust. The trainer and Kip James share a "women!" expression. The Royal Remix of the Harlem Heat Theme brings out the self-proclaimed royalty of FWC: King Booker and Queen Sharmell. They have the best position in tonight's round robin as both of the opponents that Booker is facing will be tired from previous matches. Case in point, "Set You Free" plays again and Alicia Webb and a bandaged Kip James make their way down. James has Alicia hold the ropes open as he can't seem to bend over well enough to get through them. -vs- "The G-Man" Kip James w/ Alicia Webb A smiling Booker immediately goes after the big target figuratively painted on The G-Man's ribs. He presses on his assault of punching, kicking, slamming, and otherwise applying pressure. The bandages have indeed come off and Kip is hurting pretty badly. Booker has him backed up in a corner and he goes for a spear, but James manages to step aside and Booker goes right into the metal post! This could be the break James needs! Sure enough, James zeroes in on that shoulder. After hitting it with all the legal moves he could think of, James sends Booker outside and starts ramming him into the ringpost and the ring steps. He even borrowed the ring bell while Alicia had the ref distracted to inflict serious damage. Back in the ring, a shoulderbreaker signals that James is not going to let up, so Booker goes back to what worked and headbutts James in the ribs. He sends James to the ropes, and then catches him for the Royal Book End! But he can't do it! His shoulder hurts too much. James manages to reverse the failed attempt with a half nelson slam. Pin! 1... 2.... 3! Kip James pinned Booker T after a half nelson slam in 0:13:03. Rating: *** 3/4 Kip James has done it. He finishes the night at 1-1, but his pride is somewhat salvaged. Booker T stands at 0-1 and only Monty Brown still has the opportunity to finish the night at a perfect 2-0. We cut backstage in the office of our esteemed president, Greg Valentine. Two new tag teams are standing in front of Greg Valentine's desk. Mustapha Saed and Wolfie D are dressed in some pimp gear while Chris Sabin and Chad Vicks are wearing Mega Man and World of Warcraft t-shirts respectfully. GV: Alright. Here's the deal. All of you guys want a contract to wrestle in FWC. But I've been over the finances and we really only have room for one extra team right now. Since you all showed up on your own dime. You guys can fight over the contract. GV: Now the contract isn't here. It's suspended 15 feet above the ring. Whichever team grabs that contract first wins it. Alright, ready? Go. Nobody moves. CS: What? What do you mean, go? GV: I mean go. Right now. The match already started. WD: So, shud we be, like, fightin' each other right now? GV: Sure, if you think it will help. The match has a 20 minute time limit, so don't take too long. Chad Vicks hesitatingly moves towards the door. GV: Look! He's winning! Vicks panics and bolts out the door. The Street Pimps and Sabin look at each other for a second, and then Saed knocks over Sabin with a stiff push and walks out the door. MS: Hey! Get yo' punk-ass back here. 2-UP (Chris Sabin & Chad Vicks) -vs- The Street Pimps (Mustapha Saed & Wolfie D) Saed and Wolfie go after Vicks, but it's obvious that Chad has got a great head start. Our ringside camera picks him up as he enters the arena in the middle of the crowd and he makes his way down to the ring with the Street Pimps in tow. As the Pimps narrow the gap, Vicks picks up some guy's chair and tosses at Saed's feet and effectively trips him up. Vicks gets to the ring and realizes that there's no ladder! He pathetically tried to jump, but he misses by a good ten feet. He climbs the turnbuckle, but Wolfie D makes it to the ring in time to knock him off the top turnbuckle down to the floor! The Street Pimps celebrate that like it means something, meanwhile Chris Sabin has managed to find a wooden ladder somewhere backstage and he walks down the entranceway. Saed and Wolfie run out to attack him, but Sabin clotheslines them both with the ladder! 2-UP stays in control for a good portion of the match, but the end of the match came as Wolfie D and Chris Sabin were punching each other to gain control of the ladder in order to reach the contract. Mustapha Saed rushes forward and knocks over the ladder, sacrificing his own partner! He picks up Vicks, nails him with a Walking Powerslam and rolls him outside the ring. He positions the ladder can climbs it to gain the contract! Ladder Match Street Pimps (Mustapha Saed and Wolfie D) defeated 2-UP (Chad Vicks and Chris Sabin) in 0:15:36. Rating: ** 3/4 Wolfie D wakes up to hear his theme song, Three 6 Mafia's "It's Hard out Here for a Pimp" and goes ecstatic! He joins Mustapha Saed in the ring and goes nuts like they just won the Superbowl. We cut backstage where the Prankstas, Joe E. Legend and Pete Gas, are up to no good. On the door to the Behemoths' locker room they switch the name from "Behemoths" to "Los Ilegales". They give a Snidely Whiplash laugh and slink away. The backstage camera finds Brother Devon with his head bowed in prayer. After a few seconds, he lifts his head and looks directly into the camera. BD: Buck Quartermain. I have looked into your soul and I have found you guilty. You are guilty of being an inferior wrestler and you are guilty of undue pride. But tonight is your lucky night. You will be redeemed once you feel my Saving Grace. You will be humbled and your sins will be forgiven. TESTIFY! Brother Devon does the cross hand motion and we cut back live to ringside to catch "The Iceman" Buck Quartermain coming out to The Hives' "Hate to Say I Told You So". "Ain't No Sunshine" by Woven Hand plays and Brother Devon comes out in a hooded robe. He walks slowly to the ring and gets ready to fight. -vs- "Iceman" Buck Quartermain They circle each other at first and Quartermain takes control with a headlock out of the lockup. Devon sends him to the ropes and follows up with a clothesline. The action went downhill from there. Neither of there guys have a flashy offence or much charisma by themselves and the fans really hated this match. Quartermain and Devon trade much of the same moves over and over again before Brother Devon mercifully ends this with the Saving Grave inverted DDT. Brother Devon pinned Buck Quartermain with the Saving Grace in 0:18:40. Rating: * 1/4 Backstage, in a locker room we catch Steven Richards and Victoria are watching the last few moments of the Devon-Quartermain match on a big screen TV. SR: Wow.. That was just about the worst match I've ever seen. Those guys are hacks. How did they even get a job here? V: *yawning* Oh man, thank god it's over. I was about to go into a coma. SR: I have a theory about guys who nickname themselves "Iceman". V: Oh really, what's that? SR: Well, they always turn out to be really dull people. Like Dean Malenko... That guy had no charisma. Glacier? Snore city! Mr. Freeze? AH-Nold was super stiff and boring. Iceman Parsons? Well, he wrestled in the 80s, so he must have been boring. V: What about Chuck Liddell? SR: ah ha ha ha.. C'mon Vicky, everyone knows that the UFC isn't a real sport. It's more fixed than boxing. V: Oh yeah. SR: C'mon let's go grab a snack before the next match. "The Phoenix" Jody Fleisch is in it. See? Fire! Exciting! Maybe I should get a fiery nickname.... They trail off as the walk away from the camera. The camera rotates around to catch FWC's newest employees, The Street Pimps, walking into frame. MS: Whoo-wee! We're in the Eff Dub SEE, baby! This is the big time! WD: That's whut Ah'm talkin' 'bout. Soon we'll be havin' the fancy cars wit da 19" gold spinners, mad cash and bling, and more hoes than even we can handle. MS: Hells yeah! Let's see when we start getting paid... Mustapha pulls out the wrinkled up contract from his back pocket and a pair of glasses and begins to read it. MS: Alright now... Lessee... Party of the first part... blah blah blah... grounds for termination... no compete... ah shit! WD: Yo, dawg, what's it say? When do we get the phat loot? MS: We got 25 dollars for our win today and we get no insurance, no travel pay, and no merchandise cut. WD: Damn, we got served... MS: Wolfie? WD: Yeah? WS: Shut the fuck up! Back to ringside, "Roll On" by the Living End blares as Jody Fleisch, Nigel McGuinness, and Tina McGuinness burst out of the backstage area ready for their rematch against Los Ilegales. Only this time they have a regular FWC referee. Jody grabs a microphone. JF: Well then, Stacy Keibler. We're here and we've got an official referee with us, so why don't you have another go at us right here, right now. "Eres una Puta" plays and Stacy Keibler comes out of the entranceway by herself. SK: You asked for it, you got it. Get 'em boys! Jose Maximo and Silver King rush out of backstage area, past Stacy, and slide right in the ring. Los Ilegales (Jose Maximo & Silver King) w/ Stacy Keibler -vs- New British Era ("The Phoenix" Jody Fleisch & Nigel McGuinness) w/ Tina McGuinness Both teams exchange right hands before Nigel sends Silver King outside and follows him out, continuing to stomp and punch. Maximo takes control inside the ring by nailing Jody with an Asai Moonsault out of nowhere! Jody is back up and he and Maximo exchange a bunch of quick counter-maneuver wrestling sequences. With nobody getting the upper hand Nigel gets the tag in and rushes in for a clothesline then sends Maximo into the corner, quickly following up with an avalanche! A couple of European uppercuts have Maximo reeling and Nigel brings him down with a short arm scissor. Nigel's ring position is all wrong though, as Maximo is able to shuffle over a bit and tag Silver King in. King drops an elbow on McGuinness and goes to set him up for a suplex, but Nigel goes for a small package for a two count! Nigel gets in control through brawling, but then switches tracks on Silver King by locking in his Thames Barrier wristlock. Nigel lets go and Jody jumps in and helps send Silver King to the ropes and plant him with a double armdrag. As soon as Silver King is up, Nigel hits his Pendulum Lariat. Pin... 1... 2...no, kickout. Nigel sends SK to the ropes, but is early on his backdrop attempt and King hits him with a vicious kick. A hip toss takes down McGuinness and King hits a ropeflip moonsault for a 2 count. Silver King picks him up and drops him with a powerbomb, but that gets a second two count. King tags his partner then holds down Nigel as Maximo hits him with a slingshot legdrop. Fleisch jumps in, but is cut off by the ref as Los Ilegales double team Nigel. Maximo holds Nigel as King nails him with a savate kick. King goes to bounce off the ropes, but Nigel's wife Tina catches his leg! Silver King looks down on her incredulously, but Stacy just rushes right over to Tina and tackles her. Nigel rolls out of the ring to try to protect his wife, but King slingshots himself over the top ropes onto Nigel! He didn't get all of him though and seemed to take the brunt of the aerial attack. Maximo and Fleisch trade blows inside the ring as Nigel gets a second wind and starts pummeling Silver King, stopping briefly to wrench Stacy off Tina and shove her aside. He goes to punch King again, but he sidesteps the blow and Nigel ends up punching the ring post! King smiles as he starts working that arm and shoulder like there's no tomorrow. He holds out Nigel's arm over a table and bashes it with the time keeper's bell! He sends him back in the ring, where Maximo gets tagged in and starts arm-wrenching him. Quick tags back and forth as both Ilegales take turns dealing out punishment. Fleisch is leaning in for a tag, but Nigel's nowhere nearby. King and Maximo move from one arm submission move to another and Nigel's got to start thinking about tapping out to stop himself from getting a broken arm. King locks in a Fujiwara armbar and that's all Nigel can take. He taps out! Los Ilegales win! No-DQ Match: Los Ilegales (Jose Maximo and Silver King) defeated New British Era (Jody Fleisch and Nigel McGuinness) when King made N. McGuinness submit to a Fujiwara armbar in 0:13:08. Rating: *** 1/4 [Tina McGuinness interfered against Silver King.] Backstage in a corridor, "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown is hyped up and ready for his final match. MB: Oh baby, victory is so close I can TASTE it! The laws of the jungle are clear. There is always an order of greater to lesser. The strongest hunter will always best the weaker prey. And Booker, you get beat by Kip James. A Kip James that I already injured and handed to you like a mother to a cub. Booker, if you can't beat an injured opponent, how are you going to beat the one of injured him? Simply put, you can't. I will be recognized as the best wrestler in FWC. They'll be no doubt of that after you feel the POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUNNNNCE! MB: Period. Strong words from Monty Brown, but he may have a point. The Royal Remix of the Booker T theme plays and King Booker and Queen Sharmell come out and they're lacking the usual theatrics. It looks like Booker is indeed worried. Disturbed's "Down with the Sickness" brings out Monty Brown who doesn't seem to be tired at all. -vs- "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown Monty takes control from the get-go. Taking advantage of Booker T being more tired, he strikes him hard and slams him down even harder. An Alpha Bomb gets a close two count. Booker T fights back desperately with the chops, but Monty retains momentum and continues to wear Booker down. Booker manages to nail his finisher, the Scissor Kick, but Monty kicks out and soon after responds with a Pounce. Sharmell manages to save her husband from getting pinned. Monty trade finishers a couple of times before Monty finally gets the win. Monty Brown pinned Booker T with the Pounce in 0:13:05. Rating: **** [Sharmell interfered against Monty Brown.] That's it! Monty Brown goes 2 and 0 in tonight's mini-round robin and that establishes him as the top overall wrestler in FWC. If his ego was big before, it's going to gigantic now. He celebrates to a mixed response. Nobody really likes Monty, but he put a hell of a performance tonight and he beat two top notch FWC superstars in one night. Booker T and Sharmell slinks off, it was a bad night for them, losing both their matches. The video closes out with a recap of some of the top action seen tonight. FWC (c) Unright Productions -------------------- Hey thanks for replying Justin.. It takes me a while to write out these cards. I'm hoping I can crank them out faster as I find a groove. I welcome anyone to reply with thoughts, observations, ideas, or criticisms. New additions to the roster: Heels 6'0" 251 lbs Mustapha Saed 6'1" 212 lbs Wolfie D |
| Justin | Posted on 10/29/06 at 13:02:37 I like your writing style... you give good depth to your characters in the segments between matches. I totally understand about the taking a while to write thing. I'm a week behind now on my shows because of work & not having alot of down time to get my head into it. I liked the tip to John Cleese in Rat Race with the "Aright go" segment for the ladder match. Pretty funny (actually one of the better parts of the movie). Thanks for the comments on my shows too BTW in case i forgot before. |
| Unright | Posted on 11/25/06 at 05:53:52 This isn't dead... I've just had a tough time between school, work, buying a house, painting new house, moving in new house, a death in the family, and a wedding in the family. But coming soon... The Prankstas (Pete Gas & Joe E. Legend) vs Behemoths (Typhoon & Viscera) vs The Imperialists (James Mason & Warlord) Mikey Batts vs ??? A Mystery Opponent! Triangle Match Steven Richards vs Buck Quartermain vs Brother Devon Monty Brown vs Umaga Four Corners Match Brute vs Nigel McGuinness vs Hardcore Ninja vs Booker T Kip James vs Danny Maff Los Ilegales (Jose Maximo & Silver King) vs The Street Pimps (Mustapha Saed & Wolfie D) Special Guest appearance by Rey Mysterio Jr.! CARD SUBJECT TO CHANGE! BUY YOUR TICKETS NOW! |
| meetzorak | Posted on 11/25/06 at 17:23:44 LOL, your card is classic stuff, dude. I think you should just go ahead and rename The Behemoths, The Super Duper Wrestling All-Stars. :P |
| Unright | Posted on 11/27/06 at 06:08:57 Damn Zorak, where were you when I was scratching my brain trying to come up with a name for the team of Typhoon & Viscera? |