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HWP (January)

UnrightPosted on 12/23/05 at 02:59:15

Note: As mentioned before, these are real wrestlers portraying movie character gimmicks. Identities and Finishers have been renamed to protect anonymity.

Hollywood Wrestling Act 1 Scene 1 -- 01/05/06


Michael Corleone made Dr. Frank-N-Furter submit to the Offer You Can't Refuse in 0:10:40.
Rating: ****

Right from the start, Mafioso Corleone was disgusting by the sight of Dr. Frank-N-Furter. Frank-N-Furter tried to play up the psychological advantage of his deviant tendencies, but Corleone wasn't phased. He methodically destroyed Frank-N-Furter and had him tapping as soon as he locked in his move.
(Michael Corleone +2, Dr. Frank-N-Furter -2)

Wyatt Earp pinned Conan The Barbarian with the Gun Shot in 0:16:39.
Rating: DUD
(Jeff Lebowski no-showed.)

Lebowski suddenly remembered a league bowling game he had to be at once he found out of opponent was Conan. Wyatt Earp stepped in with unwavering focus. He took on his much larger adversary and used hit-and-run tactics to control the course of the match. After Conan missed his Barbarian Splash, Earp nailed him with a Gun Shot and it was over!
(Wyatt Earp +5, Conan The Barbarian -5)

Sabertooth and Snake Pliskin battled to a draw in 0:20:00.
Rating: *** 1/2

This seemed like a mis-match on paper. I mean Snake is a badass and all, but Sabertooth is a mutant. Nevertheless, Pliskin showed amazing resilience and grit. Absorbing and even dishing out a fair amount of damage to Sabertooth. After 20 minutes of intense battle, the bell rang and Sabertooth stopped. he wasn't being paid to beat up Pliskin any more.

Marv pinned Vincent Vega after a flying shoulderblock in 0:09:45.
Rating: **

I'm surprised the match lasted as long as it did. Maybe Marv had a cold or something. He seemed distracted by something and kept mentioning a "Goldie"... Vega on the other hand seemed at a loss for what to do since he wasn't allowed to bring firearms to the ring. Even if he had, I don't think it would have helped.
(Marv +1, Vincent Vega -1)

Blade pinned Street Preacher after a spinebuster slam in 0:11:37.
Rating: ** 1/2

A great even match-up as the vampire hunter Blade went up against the cybernetically enhanced Street Preacher. Street Preacher showed awesome resiliency that often left Blade at a loss as to what he should do next. A spinebuster slam knocked the wind out of him long enough for Blade to steal the victory, but Preacher was right back up.
(Blade +1, Street Preacher -1)

Main Event:
The Candyman pinned The Incredible Hulk after a chokehold in 0:10:39.
Rating: 3/4*

The Incredible Hulk may have all sorts of extraordinary powers, but fight undead voodoo killers doesn't seem to be among them. The Candyman choked the life out of the Incredible Hulk and quietly pinned him, stunning everyone in the audience.  Hulk was only slightly pissed-off this match, but his next opponent will have to face a very angry Hulk.
(The Candyman +3, The Incredible Hulk -3)

Card rating: * 3/4
americamamushiPosted on 12/23/05 at 05:02:39

Any fed with a Rocky Horror reference rocks in my book  ;)