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OSW: Anything for a Paycheck 8/5/06

MattHarmsPosted on 08/07/06 at 17:22:17

First of all NAWA WrestleClash III should be up sometime this weekend. If you haven't predicted already and want to do so, the prediction thread should be somewhere several pages down on this message board. And now on with the show.

Disclaimer: If you like to see flippy spot fests or cliched ***** matches involving Chris Benoit and Kurt Angle, get the hell out of my thread NOW! But if you have came to see old school goodness involving the Armstrong Brothers, "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan, The Harris Brothers, and others, step right in. Also, any Juggalos may come in as the Insane Clown Posse is in this fed as well.

We open up with our god, our lord, our savior, EL DANDY~! coming out. He says the people doubted El Dandy when not putting him in the World Title match later tonight. Those who doubt El Dandy must pay as, who are you to doubt El Dandy? Yes, I'm talking to you, punk. Duane Gill comes out, saying he doubts El Dandy and it's on like Donkey Kong.

Duane Gill vs El Dandy

Nice match, classic entertainment right here. Gill hits the spear and Jackhammer but Dandy powers out and hits the most electrifying move in wrestling today, the Dandina Cradle. This scores the pin on Mr. Gill.

El Dandy pinned Duane Gill with the Dandina Cradle in 0:06:17.
Rating: * 1/2

Duane Gill is up and Dandy asks Gill if he doubts him now. Gill responds with a "no sir" and hangs his head in shame for ever doubting El Dandy.

Erik Watts and David Flair are out to groans from the crowd. They say they would be competing for the World Title tonight if their daddies were running the federation. They would be pushed straight to the top if their daddies were running the federation. Out come the Harris Twins who say they will make Flair and Watts their personal bitches. Flair and Watts scream for daddy as the Harris Twins attack them and this match begins.

The Harris Brothers vs David Flair and Erik Watts:

Watts and Flair get beat down by the Harris Twins in this match. They try to fight back but without their fathers in attendence to make sure they win, there is nothing Flair and Watts can do. Big Ron puts down David Flair with a deadly Cobra Clutch slam as Heavy D nearly decapitates Erik Watts(too bad it was only nearly) with a Big Boot to finish the match.

The Harris Brothers (Ron Harris and Don Harris) defeated
David Flair and Erik Watts when Big Ron pinned D. Flair with the
Cobra Clutch Slam in 0:05:47.
Rating: -1/4*

"Mean" Mike Enos vs Brad Armstrong

Enos pounded away on Brad but kept pulling him up off the canvas again and again, beating him down some more. Eventually Brad Armstrong manages to slip behind and connect with the Russian Legsweep to score the upset win. Mike Enos has had the indignation of losing to an Armstrong.

Brad Armstrong pinned Mike Enos with the Russian Legsweep in 0:07:46.
Rating: ** 3/4

Someone call his mama as Ernest "The Cat" Miller is out and he dances to cheers but the Maestro comes out to interrupt the Cat. The Maestro wants revenge from the Cat making him look like a fool in WCW. The Cat remembers and says he kicked the Maestro's "Buddy Landell looking ass" before.The Maestro slaps the taste out of the Cat's mouth and once again, it is on like Donkey Kong.

Ernest Miller vs the Maestro

The Cat takes Maestro out with some kicks but the Maestro avoids the Feliner. Double leg takedown into a bridge roll up and the Cat is held down for the pin, giving Maestro satisfaction and revenge from the days of WCW.

The Maestro pinned Ernest Miller with the Bridge Rollup in 0:06:01.
Rating: * 1/4

Steve and Scott Armstrong talk about how they are going to break the curse tonight, as all they have to do is defeat a couple of clowns in the Insane Clown Posse.

The Insane Clown Posse vs the Armstrong Brothers

Pretty good match, the Armstrong hit a nice series of double team moves but the Clowns were evil and deceitful during this match. Violent J broke a record over Steve Armstrong's head and Shaggy 2 Dope delivered a Legdrop off the top rope to steal the win. Scott Armstrong managed to get tangled up into the ropes and that stopped him from saving his partner. The Armstrong curse continues.

The Insane Clown Posse (Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent J) defeated
Steve Armstrong and Scott Armstrong when Shaggy pinned Steve Armstrong with the
Top-Rope Legdrop in 0:06:23.
Rating: ** 1/4

Fidel Sierra comes out, preaching the gospel of the greatest country in the world...Cuba. He waves the Cuban flag but who should come out but "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan. Duggan tells Fidel that he has no right to way that flag because this is the U S of A, the home of the brave and the land of the free. Hoooo! Tough guy. Fidel challenges Duggan to a match, saying he would take Duggan's two by four and...Duggan whacks Fidel with the two by four and the match begins.

Fidel Sierra vs "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan

Slugfest during this match with Duggan winning the exchange. Fidel used sneaky evil tactics like the evil sneaky foreigner that he is before crotching Duggan on the two by four to score a nearfall. Fidel goes up top, misses a kneedrop. Duggan takes a roll of tape from his trunks, tapes up the fist, and socks Fidel with the taped fist. Three Point Stance and that's all she wrote for Mr. Sierra.

Jim Duggan pinned Fidel Sierra with the Three Point Stance in 0:07:52.
Rating: * 1/2

Duggan celebrates but Fidel attempts to attack him from behind but Duggan lays him out again.

OSW World Heavyweight Title Match:
Dustin Rhodes vs Sean Waltman

The winner will be the first OSW world heavyweight champion. Dustin and Waltman have a match with Dustin scoring a nearfall with the Bulldog. Shattered Dreams kick is ineffective on Waltman for some reason and the referee pulls Dustin away, allowing Waltman to low blow Dustin from behind. X-Factor brings Dustin down into the canvas and Sean Waltman scores the pin to be the first OSW World Heavyweight Champion.

Match for the vacant OSW World Heavyweight Title
Sean Waltman pinned Dustin Rhodes with the X-Factor in 0:10:12.
Rating: * 3/4
(Sean Waltman won the OSW World Heavyweight Title.)

Waltman does obscene gestures with the belt before running off as Dustin looks pissed that he got screwed out of the title. Erik Watts and David Flair come out to talk to Dustin Rhodes and we fade to black.

Next Week: Jake "The Snake" Roberts(if he is in any condition to compete that is).
americamamushiPosted on 08/07/06 at 19:48:11

That opening bit with El Dandy has already won me over on OSW :)  If Duane Gill's catch phrase in OSW is going to be "It's on like Donkey Kong" I want it on a -Tshirt.  I love how Duane hits both of his big moves... and nothing.  Poor Duane.  

I'm diggin OSW so far.  The only ones I'd replace are ICP, but I've never dug ICP in wrestling or music.

I was rootin' for Rhodes to take the belt home.  He's always been a dirty pleasure of mine in TNM.  Rhodes seems to be in with Flair and Watts... would we have a "Daddy's Boys" stable on our hands?  That's actually not a bad combination/gimmick for them.  

And I was a lot more amused that I probably should've been by your comment about Jake Roberts there at the end.  ;)

Good stuff, I look forward to more.
91Posted on 08/07/06 at 19:49:22

Wait, how can a Mike Enos loss be an UPSET? I know Brad Armstrong doesn't have the greatest win-loss record ever but it wouldn't be an upset if I beat Mike Enos. No disrespect to Blake Beverly and all, but still... who are you to doubt Brad Armstrong?

Waltman being unaffected by the Shattered Dreams was pretty funny though, what would make it sweeter would be if Waltman was accompanied by Chyna and it DID hurt... oh never mind. I think the only person who can stop Waltman now is Jake Roberts, if he's up to it.