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LIW Blast Off - 1/29/05

Critic of the DawnPosted on 12/29/04 at 04:28:22

Well, here's the first card of LIW.  As is usual of circuits that haven't been around for long, some of the match ratings were lower than I might have liked.  However, for the most part I was very pleased at how things went.  I hope you are as well.

I'm going to be doing a slightly different format with this circuit than with NDW.  Instead of ending with a preview of the next card, I'll be posting previews and other circuit related news in the days after initially posting the card.  This should make things slightly easier for me.

*****

(War Pigs by Black Sabbath hits as the Harris Twins make their way to the ring.
One of them... is that Don? ...grabs a microphone.)

Don(?) Harris: Well, isn't this just typical.  Yet another promotion signs us
on as a pair of monsters, but when push comes to shove, they don't even have
anything for us!

Ron(?) Harris: We're sick and tired of being overlooked!  After we came all the
way up here, we find out we don't even have a freakin' match tonight!  
Bullshit!

Don(?) Harris: So here's what we're gonna do...  Me and Don here are gonna sit
our asses down in the center of this ring, and if the boys in the back don't
give us the main event slot against Foley tonight... well, I guess this is
gonna be a pretty dull show.

Don Harris: Damn straight, Ron.  I've taken dumps bigger than La Parka and
Jonny Storm.  Oh wow, they can do flippy things!  How impressive!  Big freakin'
deal!  LIW wanted a couple of monsters, they've got a couple of monsters!  And
there's nothing that anyone in the back can do!

(As the crowd boos, Stars and Stripes Forever hits and Team USA head out from
the back with microphones.)

Sgt. Slaughter: Stop bitching, maggots!  I've never seen two bigger babies in
all my years in the wrestling business!

Jim Duggan: USA!  USA!  USA!

Sgt. Slaughter: ...Right.  Anyway, here's what's gonna happen.  You two want a
match, you've got one.  If you think you can stop this show from happening,
you're going to have to deal with Team USA!  Isn't that right, Hacksaw?

Jim Duggan: HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(Duggan and Slaughter hit the ring, followed quickly by a referee.  The bell
rings and it looks like we have an impromptu match to start off LIW's first
ever show!)

The Harris Twins vs. Team USA

Don Harris goes for a backbreaker, but Sgt. Slaughter counters it with
a facerake.
The crowd is really behind Sgt. Slaughter.
Sgt. Slaughter gives him a facerake, but Don Harris doesn't budge.
Sgt. Slaughter uses a stomachbreaker on Don Harris.
Sgt. Slaughter executes the Camel Clutch on Don Harris.
Martin Kester checks Don Harris's arm.
He lifts it... it falls.
He lifts it... it stays up !
Don Harris fights his way out of the hold after 17 seconds.
Ron Harris enters the ring to make it two-on-one.
Jim Duggan enters the ring and throws Ron Harris out of the ring.
Jim Duggan executes a clothesline on Don Harris.
Sgt. Slaughter gets a cobra clutch on Don Harris.
Don Harris reaches the ropes after being locked up for 5 seconds.
Jim Duggan leaves the ring.
Sgt. Slaughter goes for a facerake, but Don Harris blocks it.

Jim Duggan leaves the ring.
Sgt. Slaughter whips Ron Harris into the ropes.
Ron Harris takes Sgt. Slaughter down with a flying clothesline.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.
Ron Harris uses a fist to the midsection on Sgt. Slaughter.
Ron Harris hits Sgt. Slaughter with a waistlock suplex.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Ron Harris executes a kneedrop on Sgt. Slaughter.
Quite a few boos are audible.
Ron Harris is going for the pin.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Ron Harris runs into the ropes.
Ron Harris misses with a shoulderblock.
Ron Harris goes for the Big Boot, but Sgt. Slaughter counters it with
a duck-down move.
Sgt. Slaughter takes Ron Harris down with a clothesline.
Sgt. Slaughter goes for a kick to the midsection, but Ron Harris blocks it.

Jim Duggan executes the Old Glory on Ron Harris.
The crowd is going crazy.
Jim Duggan goes for the pin.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, Don Harris makes the save.
Ron Harris goes for a roundhouse right, but Jim Duggan blocks it.
Jim Duggan whips Ron Harris into the ropes, but Ron Harris reverses it.
Ron Harris hits Jim Duggan with an elbow.
Ron Harris gives him a roundhouse right, but Jim Duggan doesn't budge.
Ron Harris goes for a flying clothesline, but Jim Duggan ducks out of the way.
Jim Duggan punches Ron Harris.
Jim Duggan kicks Ron Harris.
Jim Duggan chops Ron Harris.
Jim Duggan executes an inverted atomic drop on Ron Harris.
Jim Duggan whips Ron Harris into the ropes.
Ron Harris misses with an elbow.
Jim Duggan uses a three point stance on Ron Harris.
The chants for Jim Duggan are deafening.
Jim Duggan covers Ron Harris.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, Don Harris makes the save.
Jim Duggan takes Ron Harris down with an inverted atomic drop.
Jim Duggan uses a hiptoss on Ron Harris.
Jim Duggan whips Ron Harris into the ropes.
Ron Harris hits Jim Duggan with a kick.
Ron Harris gives him a legdrop, but Jim Duggan only stares at him.
Jim Duggan punches Ron Harris.
The chants for Jim Duggan are deafening.
Ron Harris kicks Jim Duggan.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.
Jim Duggan punches Ron Harris.
The chants for Jim Duggan are deafening.
Jim Duggan hits Ron Harris.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.
Ron Harris punches Jim Duggan.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.

Martin Kester counts:  2.
Sgt. Slaughter throws Don Harris into the ringsteps.
Jim Duggan comes over to make it two-on-one.
Ron Harris comes over and lays out Jim Duggan.
Don Harris and Ron Harris hit Sgt. Slaughter with a double facerake.
Martin Kester counts:  3.
Don Harris climbs back into the ring.
Sgt. Slaughter follows him back in.
Don Harris gets a chokehold on Sgt. Slaughter.
Martin Kester warns Don Harris to let go.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, three, four.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, three, four.
Ron Harris enters the ring.
Ron Harris and Don Harris hit Sgt. Slaughter with the H-Bomb.
Don Harris goes for the pin.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, Jim Duggan makes the save.

Sgt. Slaughter goes for a headbutt, but Don Harris blocks it.
Don Harris goes for a back suplex, but Sgt. Slaughter counters it with
a facerake.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Sgt. Slaughter.
Sgt. Slaughter goes for a vertical suplex, but Don Harris blocks it.
Don Harris throws Sgt. Slaughter out of the ring.
Martin Kester counts: one, two, three, four, five, six, Sgt. Slaughter
reenters the ring.
Don Harris goes for a bearhug, but Sgt. Slaughter counters it with a facerake.
Sgt. Slaughter runs into the ropes.
Sgt. Slaughter hits Don Harris with a clothesline.
Sgt. Slaughter executes the Camel Clutch on Don Harris.
Don Harris is inching his way towards the ropes.
Don Harris is writhing in pain.
Don Harris submits after 13 seconds.
The crowd is on its feet cheering for Sgt. Slaughter.

The winners are Team USA. Time of match: 0:27:59

Team USA (Jim Duggan and Sgt. Slaughter) defeated
The Harris Twins (Ron Harris and Don Harris) when Slaughter made Heavy D
submit to the Camel Clutch in 0:27:59.
Rating: -*** 3/4

The first ever LIW show starts with what can only be called a clash of the titans.  None of the men involved in this match are known for their excellent technical wrestling skills, so this was nothing more than a brutal back and forth brawl.  In the end, Don (we think) Harris tapped out to Slaughter's Camel Clutch, and both Harrises beat a quick retreat to the back as Slaughter and Duggan celebrated in the center of the ring as if they had just captured Berlin from the Nazis.

(We go to a backstage interview now, where Jonny Storm is stretching in
preperation for tonight's main event.)

Jonny Storm: You Yanks seem to think that you've got a monopoly on wrestling.
Now, it's nothing personal, but that simply isn't so.  While you're best and
brightest have gotten multi-million dollar contracts, in Britain we either
have to work our asses off in hopes of drawing half as many people as are here
tonight, or emigrate to this country to make a name for ourselves.  It wasn't
always this way, of course...  but that's neither here nor there.  The fact of
the matter is that I am here in LIW for one thing and one thing only.  I am
here to make a name for myself.  It's nothing personal, but if... when I take
Foley down, my career will never be the same.  I'm called "The British
Sensation" for a reason... with enough success here, I will be able to rebuild
the British Wrestling scene to the same point it was at with World of Sport
back in the day...  So I'm warning you.  Don't cross me unless you want to end
up as a footnote in my rise to stardome.

(The camera moves to the other side of the locker room, where La Parka Jr. is
preparing for his match... by doing a goofy dance.  He seems unaware of the
camera's presence, so after several impressive steps we return to ringside for
our next match.)

"The Master of the Eight Angles" Octagon & Mikey Whipwreck vs. The Impact Players

Justin Credible and Lance Storm hit Octagon with a double DDT.
Lance Storm leaves the ring.
Justin Credible throws Octagon out of the ring.
Justin Credible rolls out under the bottom rope.
Justin Credible reenters the ring.
Octagon rolls back in under the bottom rope.
Justin Credible chops Octagon.
Octagon hits Justin Credible.
Justin Credible chops Octagon.
Justin Credible is starting to get under the crowd's skin.
Justin Credible hits Octagon.
Quite a few boos are audible.
Justin Credible gives the sign for the That's Incredible.
Justin Credible executes the That's Incredible on Octagon.
Quite a few boos are audible.
Justin Credible goes for the pin.
Booker T counts: One, two, three.
A fan at ringside badmouths Justin Credible.

The winners are The Impact Players. Time of match: 0:11:33

Match with Special Referee Booker T:
The Impact Players (Justin Credible and Lance Storm) defeated
Octagon and Mikey Whipwreck when Credible pinned Octagon with the
That's Incredible in 0:11:33.
Rating: ***

Mikey Whipwreck and Octagon entered seperately to their own music respectively, while The Impact Players came out together with Prong's Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck blaring.  The match that followed was competitive at first, but The Impact Players quickly took advantage with a series of tag team maneuvers, and were able to isolate Octagon from his partner.  Eventually, Credible put Octagon away with That's Incredible, knocking him out cold.

Following the match, Mikey tried to revive his partner, then turned to Referee Booker T, demanding to know why he didn't do something about The Impact Players double teaming Octagon.  Booker T replied that he had to call it like he saw it... SUCKA!  Mikey got in his face, implying that Booker T must have lost his eyesight after taking a few too many chairshots!  Booker responded by shoving Mikey, who promptly cowered away from the angry Booker T.  Booker looked molified at Mikey's cowardice... until Octagon attacked him from behind!  Octagon and Mikey Whipwreck are beating the hell out of Booker T for what they see as poor officiating!  Booker may be a former World Champion, but this is two against one, and Booker wasn't expecting to fight tonight!  By the time Mikey and Octagon are pulled away, Booker T is practically out cold and has to be helped to the back!

Don Juan vs. Too Cold Scorpio

Too Cold Scorpio hits Don Juan with spinning headscissors.
Too Cold Scorpio hits Don Juan with a German suplex.
Both combatants' shoulders are on the mat.
Harry Alston counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Too Cold Scorpio goes for a German suplex, but Don Juan blocks it.
Don Juan hits Too Cold Scorpio with a jawbreaker.
The crowd is starting to get behind Don Juan.
Don Juan runs into the ropes.
Too Cold Scorpio hits Don Juan with a shoulderblock.
Too Cold Scorpio hits spinning headscissors on Don Juan.
Too Cold Scorpio hits Don Juan with a standing moonsault.
Harry Alston counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Too Cold Scorpio takes Don Juan down with spinning headscissors.
Too Cold Scorpio nails Don Juan with spinning headscissors.
Too Cold Scorpio hits Don Juan with spinning headscissors.
Too Cold Scorpio executes a moonsault on Don Juan.
Harry Alston counts: One, two, three.
Too Cold Scorpio is starting to get under the crowd's skin.

The winner is Too Cold Scorpio. Time of match: 0:07:37

Too Cold Scorpio pinned Don Juan after a moonsault in 0:07:37.
Rating: ** 1/4

Don Juan came into this match hoping to prove himself against Too Cold Scorpio, who is a veteran high flier who has competed in venues across the world.  Unfortunately for him, Scorpio turned out to be just a bit too much for him.  Don Juan had the advantage, but he made the mistake of waving to an attractive woman in the front row at ringside, giving Scorpio a chance to recover enough to reverse a Northern Lights Suplex into a DDT.  After that, it was only a few quick high flying moves until Don Juan was looking at the lights.

Kensuke Sasaki vs. Simon Diamond

Kensuke Sasaki hits a powerslam on Simon Diamond.
Kensuke Sasaki executes the Power Special Stranglehold on Simon Diamond.
Alan Tso asks Simon Diamond if he should stop the fight.
Simon Diamond shakes his head.
Alan Tso asks Simon Diamond if he should stop the fight.
Simon Diamond shakes his head.
Alan Tso tells Simon Diamond to respond or he'll stop the fight.
Simon Diamond nods.
Alan Tso checks Simon Diamond's arm.
He lifts it... it falls.
He lifts it... it falls.
He lifts it... it stays up !
Simon Diamond fights his way out of the hold after 27 seconds.
Simon Diamond nails Kensuke Sasaki with a Northern Lights suplex.
Alan Tso counts: One, two, kickout.
Simon Diamond complains about a slow count.
Kensuke Sasaki hits Simon Diamond with an inside cradle.
Alan Tso counts: One, shoulder up.

Simon Diamond hits a kick to the head on Kensuke Sasaki.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.
Simon Diamond uses an elbowsmash on Kensuke Sasaki.
Simon Diamond attempts to place Kensuke Sasaki on the turnbuckle, but
Kensuke Sasaki blocks it.
Simon Diamond takes Kensuke Sasaki down with an uppercut.
Simon Diamond whips Kensuke Sasaki into the ropes.
Simon Diamond hits Kensuke Sasaki with a kick.
Simon Diamond nails Kensuke Sasaki with a chop.
Simon Diamond uses a cobra clutch suplex on Kensuke Sasaki.
Simon Diamond whips Kensuke Sasaki into the ropes.
Kensuke Sasaki goes for a lariat, but Simon Diamond counters it with a crucifix.

Alan Tso counts: One, two, kickout.
Simon Diamond hits Kensuke Sasaki with a DDT.
A wave of boos is going through the crowd.
Simon Diamond gets a scorpion deathlock on Kensuke Sasaki.
Kensuke Sasaki is struggling to reach the ropes.
Kensuke Sasaki makes it to the ropes after 5 seconds.
Simon Diamond executes the Simonizer on Kensuke Sasaki.
The crowd is booing Simon Diamond.
Simon Diamond goes for the pin.
Simon Diamond uses the ropes for leverage.
Alan Tso counts: One, two, three.
Numerous fans are using Simon Diamond for target practice.

The winner is Simon Diamond. Time of match: 0:13:34

Simon Diamond pinned Kensuke Sasaki with the Simonizer in 0:13:34.
Rating: ** 1/2

While many of LIW's workers are unfamiliar with the Japanese Style that Kensuke Sasaki excels in, Sasaki's defeat here at the hands of Simon Diamond would seem to indicate that the Power Warrior is just as unfamiliar with the American Style.  Sasaki actually had this match won after locking Diamond into his lethal Power Special Stranglehold, but Simon quickly played dead so the referee would check to see if he had lost consciousness.  When his hand started to fall for the third time, Sasaki released the hold, allowing Simon to roll away and continue the fight.  Caught off balance, Sasaki proved to be easy prey for the Simonizer.  As Drain STH's "Simon Says" blared over the PA, Simon Diamond declared that this was just the beginning, and that he would not be underestimated again.

"The King of Old School" Steve Corino vs. Takao Omori in a match for the Zero-One United National Heavyweight Title

Takao Omori goes for a sleeperhold, but Steve Corino counters it with
a back suplex.
Steve Corino hits Takao Omori with a chop.
Steve Corino runs into the ropes.
Takao Omori goes for an enzuigiri, but Steve Corino ducks out of the way.
Steve Corino chops Takao Omori.
The crowd is booing Steve Corino.
Steve Corino punches Takao Omori.
Steve Corino nails Takao Omori with a power bomb.
Martin Kester counts: One, kickout.
Steve Corino goes for an abdominal stretch, but Takao Omori reverses it.
Steve Corino grabs the ropes after being trapped for 7 seconds.
Takao Omori goes for a brain buster, but Steve Corino blocks it.
Steve Corino uses a DDT on Takao Omori.
A fan at ringside badmouths Steve Corino.
Steve Corino executes a chop on Takao Omori.
Steve Corino goes for an armbar submission, but Takao Omori counters it with
an eye gouge.
Takao Omori runs into the ropes.
Takao Omori hits Steve Corino with a kick.
Takao Omori gives the sign for the Flying Elbowdrop.
Takao Omori executes the Flying Elbowdrop on Steve Corino.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, shoulder up.
Takao Omori complains about a slow count.
Takao Omori goes for a DDT, but Steve Corino blocks it.
Steve Corino catches Takao Omori in a front facelock.
Takao Omori is struggling to reach the ropes.
Martin Kester checks Takao Omori's arm.
He lifts it... it stays up !
Takao Omori fights his way out of the hold after 16 seconds.
Takao Omori runs into the ropes.
Steve Corino and Takao Omori get hit with a double clothesline.
Steve Corino executes the Old School Expulsion on Takao Omori.
Steve Corino further incites the crowd.
Steve Corino goes for the pin.
Martin Kester counts: One, two, three.
Takao Omori complains about a fast count.
The ring is quickly filling up with debris.

The winner is Steve Corino. Time of match: 0:13:03

[Zero-One United National Heavyweight Title Match]:
Steve Corino pinned Takao Omori with the Old School Expulsion in 0:13:03.
Rating: ** 1/2

Steve Corino wins!

If you believe in Karma, you have to think that Corino's setting this match up for no charge to help make LIW's first ever show special as a personal favor to Mick Foley helped him pick up the victory here.  The Zero-One United National Heavyweight Title now belongs to the King of Old School, and the crowd loves it!  This match was even from beginning to end, and it actually looked like Omori was set to retain when he hit his Flying Elbow.  The referee took a few moments to get into position, however, and Corino managed to kick out.  Just moments later, Corino hit his own signiture move, the Old School Expulsion, and Omori went down for the count.  Corino celebrates with the title as Apotheosis' "O Fortuna" techno remix blares triumphantly.

(Steppenwolf's "Born to be Wild" hits and The Hardcore Legend himself, Mick
Foley, makes his way to the ring.)

Mick Foley: It's great to be back here in my native Long Island, New York!

(The crowd goes wild for this cheap pop.)

Mick Foley: But guys... I have to say.  I didn't come here tonight to talk.  I
came here... to kick... some everloving ass!  BANG BANG!  So I was talking to
the booking committee the other day, and they told me that they couldn't decide
on a single opponent for me here tonight.  So they've found two amazing
wrestlers... who I fully intend to dismantle right here... in the center of
this ring... before I shove a sweaty disgusting sock that's been places that
even my wife would rather not think about down their throats!  La Parka... I've
been trying to think of something I can say to sound fierce, but really, I'd
feel kind of like a bully for picking on the skeleton of a minority midget!
And Jonny Storm... if you actually think you can make your name at the expense
of Mick Foley, you have another think coming!  I was diving off of scaffholds
before you even started your ballet lessons, Storm.  Because I've seen tapes
of your stuff... and if you call the choreographed flips you and Fleisch did
throughout England wrestling, then I rather suspect you're also of the opinion
that chess is a sport!  I'm sure you disagree, Jonny, but by the time I'm done
beating the truth into you, I suspect you'll understand why I'm called The
Hardcore Legend!  Have a nice day!

Arn Anderson vs. Frank Shamrock vs. Rico vs. Lash LeRoux vs. Scott Steiner in a 5 Man Elimination Match

Rico punches Arn Anderson.
Rico further incites the crowd.
Rico goes for a powerslam, but Arn Anderson counters it with
a swinging neckbreaker.
The crowd is giving Arn Anderson a standing ovation.
Rico begs off.
Arn Anderson executes the Spinebuster on Rico.
Steven Silvers counts: One, two, in the ropes...
(Lash LeRoux and Scott Steiner are going at it.)
Lash LeRoux hits Scott Steiner with a punch.
(Rico and Scott Steiner are going at it.)
Rico nails Scott Steiner with a powerslam.
Steven Silvers counts: One, two, in the ropes...
(Lash LeRoux and Rico are going at it.)
Lash LeRoux hits Rico with a flying cross body press.
Steven Silvers counts: One, two, three.
** Rico has been eliminated.
Lash LeRoux is getting a pissed look amidst all the boos.
(Lash LeRoux and Arn Anderson are going at it.)
(Scott Steiner and Arn Anderson are going at it.)
Scott Steiner uses a legsweep faceslam on Arn Anderson.
Scott Steiner is going for the cover.
Steven Silvers counts: One, two, three.
** Arn Anderson has been eliminated.
The ring is quickly filling up with debris.
(Scott Steiner and Frank Shamrock are going at it.)
Scott Steiner gets a bearhug on Frank Shamrock.
Frank Shamrock is valiantly trying to break the hold.
Frank Shamrock breaks the hold after 6 seconds.
Frank Shamrock catches Scott Steiner in a single-leg takedown into a leglock.
Lash LeRoux makes the save.
Frank Shamrock goes for a roundhouse right, but Scott Steiner reverses it.
In turn, Frank Shamrock counters it with a punch.
Frank Shamrock gives him a slap, but Scott Steiner doesn't even care.
Frank Shamrock gives him a slap, but Scott Steiner doesn't even care.

Lash LeRoux takes Frank Shamrock down with a superplex.
Lash LeRoux chops Frank Shamrock.
Lash LeRoux seemingly enjoys the boos.
Lash LeRoux chops Frank Shamrock.
Lash LeRoux gives the sign for the Death Valley Slam.
Lash LeRoux executes the Death Valley Slam on Frank Shamrock.
Lash LeRoux seemingly enjoys the boos.
Lash LeRoux goes for the pin.
Steven Silvers counts: One, two, Scott Steiner doesn't make it in time... three.
** Frank Shamrock has been eliminated.
Lash LeRoux is getting a pissed look amidst all the boos.
(Lash LeRoux and Scott Steiner are going at it.)
Lash LeRoux nails Scott Steiner with a dropkick.
Lash LeRoux goes for a half Boston, but Scott Steiner blocks it.
Scott Steiner whips Lash LeRoux into the ropes.
Lash LeRoux executes a clothesline on Scott Steiner.

Lash LeRoux goes for a Boston crab, but Scott Steiner blocks it.
Scott Steiner goes for a power bomb, but Lash LeRoux counters it with a backdrop
.
Lash LeRoux goes for a fistdrop, but Scott Steiner rolls out of the way.
Scott Steiner takes Lash LeRoux down with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex.
Scott Steiner is getting a pissed look amidst all the boos.
Scott Steiner runs into the ropes.
Lash LeRoux hits a bodyslam on Scott Steiner.
Lash LeRoux goes for a clothesline, but Scott Steiner ducks out of the way.
Scott Steiner hits Lash LeRoux with a backdrop.
Scott Steiner goes for an elbowdrop, but Lash LeRoux rolls out of the way.
Lash LeRoux nails Scott Steiner with a slingshot legdrop.
Lash LeRoux covers Scott Steiner.
Steven Silvers counts: One, two, three.
** Scott Steiner has been eliminated.
Lash LeRoux seemingly enjoys the boos.

The winner is Lash LeRoux. Time of match: 0:21:30

[5 Man Elimination Match]: 5-Man Battle Royal:
Lash LeRoux won a 5-man Battle Royal:
        x LeRoux defeated Rico after a flying cross body press in 0:14:44
        x S. Steiner defeated Anderson after a legsweep faceslam in 0:14:46
        x LeRoux defeated Frank Shamrock after the Death Valley Slam in
          0:19:31
        x LeRoux defeated S. Steiner after a slingshot legdrop in 0:21:30
Rating: ****

What a coup for Lash LeRoux!  Many seemed to consider him an afterthought on LIW's roster, but in tonight's 5 Man Elimination Match, he was a house of fire, eliminating three of his four opponents with great speed and skill.  If LeRoux can continue to bring this level of competition to the table, he has a very good chance of showing the world that he's more than just a comedic Cajun stereotype.

Your Main Event:
"Son of 1,000 Bones" La Parka Jr. vs. "The British Sensation" Jonny Storm vs. "The Hardcore Legend" Mick Foley

Mick Foley throws La Parka Jr. out of the ring.
Mick Foley goes through the ropes.
Mick Foley sets up a table.
Mick Foley sets up La Parka Jr. on the table.
Mick Foley executes a DDT through the table.
The table is broken in half.
Mick Foley whips La Parka Jr. into the guardrail.
Mick Foley sets up a table.
Mick Foley throws La Parka Jr. into the guardrail.
Ted Blandford counts:  1.
They're brawling inside the ring area.
Mick Foley sets up La Parka Jr. on the table.
Mick Foley tries to drive La Parka Jr. through the table with a back suplex,
but he blocks it.
La Parka Jr. whips Mick Foley into the guardrail.
La Parka Jr. shoves Mick Foley into the guardrail.
La Parka Jr. executes a slap on Mick Foley.

La Parka Jr. misses with a clothesline.
La Parka Jr. uses a dropkick on Mick Foley.
La Parka Jr. nails Mick Foley with a drop toe hold.
La Parka Jr. tags out to Jonny Storm.
Jonny Storm executes a roundhouse right on Mick Foley.
Jonny Storm is going for the pin.
Ted Blandford counts: One, two, kickout.
Jonny Storm hits a flying somersault sitdown splash on Mick Foley.
Ted Blandford counts: One, two, kickout.
Jonny Storm goes for an armbar submission, but Mick Foley blocks it.
Mick Foley tags out to La Parka Jr..
La Parka Jr. whips Jonny Storm into the ropes, but Jonny Storm reverses it.
Jonny Storm goes for a slap, but La Parka Jr. blocks it.
La Parka Jr. goes for an Asai moonsault bodyblock, but Jonny Storm
side-steps and La Parka Jr. only hits air.
Jonny Storm takes La Parka Jr. down with a spinning leg lariat.
The crowd is going crazy.
Jonny Storm whips La Parka Jr. into the ropes, but La Parka Jr. reverses it.
La Parka Jr. uses a powerslam on Jonny Storm.
Ted Blandford counts: One, two, three.
The crowd is going into a frenzy.

The winner is La Parka Jr.. Time of match: 0:11:22

Triangle Match:
La Parka Jr. defeated Jonny Storm and Mick Foley when Parka Jr. pinned J. Storm
after a powerslam in 0:11:22.
Rating: ** 3/4

La Parka Jr. gets the shocking win here with a quick powerslam out of nowhere to Jonny Storm.  Mick Foley, bleeding on the outside, looks stunned that he lost the first match in his promotion's history without even being involved in the decision.  But really, to watch the match, La Parka's victory doesn't seem too improbable.  He kept up with Jonny Storm inside the ring, and outside of the ring he brawled very evenly with Foley, and even busted him open after being put through a table.

Jonny Storm, on the other hand, looks disgusted.  He grabs a microphone.  "What the hell was that?  How the hell did the UK's best wrestler lose to a washed up stuntman and a retard dressed up like a skeleton?  I'll tell you how.  The two of you were working together against me!  From the very beginning of the match, you were both gunning for me.  Because you know that it is my desiny to make a name for myself at your expenses, and in doing so to bring respectability back to British wrestling!  But you couldn't just lay down and die, could you?  You had to fight it.  I could beat either one of you easily in singles action you know!  I wouldn't even break a sweat!  Hell, I could probably take you both on in one night without even starting to breathe heavily!  Next time we meet in this ring... both of you are going down!  Mark my words!"

As the furious Brit made his way to the back, Mick Foley grabbed a microphone and called after him.  "Any time, any where!  Next time I see your scrawny little ass, I'm going to punt it all the way back across the Atlantic to England!  BANG BANG!"  La Parka remained silent, however, and simply danced a victory dance as George Thorogood's Bad To The Bone played.

Card rating: ** 3/4

Match of the Evening: Arn Anderson vs. Frank Shamrock vs. Rico vs. Scott Steiner vs. Lash LeRoux (5 Man Elimination Match)

*****

Eric "Critic of the Dawn"
Critic of the DawnPosted on 12/30/04 at 19:42:48

Welcome back to the home of LIW!  Here's the latest news about the most exciting new promotion on the East Coast!

Negotiations for our next show have been completed, and the show will be held on February 26, 2005.

Pro Wrestling Zero-One officials have reviewed the tape of Steve Corino's title match against Takao Omori, and have decided to nullify the title change due to what they refer to as biased officiating.  While we don't believe that this was intentional, a review of the tape does indeed reveal that the final count was a bit faster than is the norm.  As such, referee Martin Kester has been formally reprimanded.

Arn Anderson was reportedly very impressed with the performance of Lash LeRoux against him in the 5 Man Elimination Match at Blast Off.  He has therefore requested that a tag team be formed between LeRoux and himself.  Lash LeRoux has not yet replied, but once we know what he says, we'll pass along the word at once!

The Impact Players have claimed that if Octagon and Mikey Whipwreck are so worried about Booker T screwing them, they are welcome to have a rematch against them with another referee.  Octagon has reportedly accepted on behalf of his partner, and so the two teams will meet once again on 2/26.  Octagon has said that he is confident that his team will achieve victory, and that he and Whipwreck have already begun working on their teamwork.

Finally, Mick Foley and La Parka Jr. have accepted Jonny Storm's challenge, and Foley has claimed that he looks forward to teaching Storm a lesson.  As such, it appears that The British Sensation will have to take on both Mick Foley and La Parka in singles matches at the next show.  The booking committee is apparently not entirely pleased with this arrangement, however, so stay tuned in case any changes are made.

That's all for now.  We'll have the latest news as it becomes available.

*****

Eric "Critic of the Dawn"
Snabbit888Posted on 12/31/04 at 20:30:13

A new fed by good ol' Eric, and boy, I wish I didn't have prior knowledge that this was ruleset.  Even if it was ruleset, it's nice to be kept int he dark, as you know how I am. :)

The opening match sees Team USA go almost 30 minutes!  They both should be dead for wrestling that long.  Poor Harris Brothers.

The Booker T as a ref schtick is really cool.  It gives things a whole different dimension when you have a wrestler who in theory could be wrestling still as a referee.  I didn't think it would take too long for someone to start fucking around with him, and lo and behold, I was right.  Huge fines should be levied!  I thought about using a wrestler as a ref down the line, but now it'll look like I'm stealing your ideas!  I am the Vince McMahon to your Anubis.

Upon closer inspection, I realize how close this is to ROH's first show.  No problem with that; I knew you were basing this on ROH, but I just noticed how the 5-man elimination match, Corino vs. Omari, and the main event mirror the first ROH show.

Good main event... didn't expect ol' Parka to win.  Nor did I expect Foley, as he wouldn't put himself over in the main event of his first show.  Then again, you run unbooked, so eh. :)

Solid outing to start.
91Posted on 12/31/04 at 21:41:37

Sod those ideas your stealing, the Shannon Moore-fishbowl angle on Smackdown this week is EXACTLY the same as an old angle I did with Curt Hennig and Scott Putski. Damn that Vince McMahon.

Still, I find myself having to root for Jonny Storm here, being British and all. He seems to be slipping nicely into the mould of the franchise heel so to speak. Still, gotta love La Parka. And props for bringing Team USA in again too. That said, you may be finding a way to get me to like the Harris'. Time will tell yet, but still, nice first effort.
Critic of the DawnPosted on 12/31/04 at 22:42:03

Oh, I'm not releasing any of the rules until I get 6 months (6 cards) in. Then I'll release the rules for the cards I've run thus far. Ruleset feds can be a bit predictable if you've seen the template, so I'm being a bastard by not releasing the template until people get a chance to see the fed.

I was shocked and dismayed to see Team USA and The Harris Twins go for almost 30 minutes. Believe me when I say that I'm glad *I* wasn't in the audience for that, even if the rest of the show was solid enough.

Booker T was going to be the next guy I brought in to NDW when I ran out of Rick's rules, so I felt like I owed him a spot. The guest referee schtick seemed to be something that would work well, however. So... yeah.

Since the ruleset I'm building is based on ROH, you'll probably recognise a little from the layout of some of the shows. The 5 Man Elimination Match actually isn't included in the rules, but I felt like I had to put it in because I had one babyface and 4 heels left over, and I try to keep most of my matches between faces and heels. I was shocked when it went over as well as it did, however.

I guess you were pulling for Storm, then? In all honesty, I could have run easily with any of them winning. Things might have gotten odd if La Parka Jr. lost, however. But I say too much.

And 91, there's nothing wrong with rooting for Brits. I was cheering for Doug Williams in his title match against Samoa Joe back in September. And the face/heel divide is weaker in the indies than in the big leagues. I personally like Storm's reasoning. It's going to help to build him up as a major heel, but at the same time it makes a certain degree of sense. With a big enough star, professional wrestling probably *could* take off again in the UK.

*****

Welcome once again to the home of LIW. Here is the latest news we've been able to put together.

The booking committee has determined that Jonny Storm facing both Mick Foley and La Parka Jr. in one evening will leave Storm at an unfair disadvantage in his second match. Mick Foley has therefore levelled a challenge to La Parka Jr., which has been accepted as well. Therefore, on February 26, LIW will present A Challenge Accepted, a show headlined by a triple main event. Mick Foley, La Parka Jr., and Jonny Storm will all face each other in singles matches in an effort to determine who the best really is.

Lash LeRoux has accepted Arn Anderson's invitation to team with him at the next LIW show, stating that he was honored to be singled out by a legend of Anderson's stature. A match has been signed for them at the next show. Arn Anderson and Lash LeRoux will be facing The Harris Twins and Team USA in a Triangle Tag Team Match. Anderson and LeRoux give up quite a bit of size to these two teams, but with Anderson's experience and LeRoux's fire, they just might be able to pull out a victory.

Speaking of tag team action, LIW is pleased to present a match between two mystery tag teams with a Long Island Wrestling contract on the line! A strong tag team division is already beginning to take shape here in LIW, and hopefully this match will allow us to continue to add to that division.

Finally, Booker T actually had to spend the night in the hospital with a concussion after Mikey Whipwreck and Octagon's attack. He is now said to be absolutely furious that he was attacked in this manner, and has not appeared in public since the attack. Sources close to Booker T speculate that he may be training for an attempt to gain revenge in the ring.

The card thus far looks like this:

* Jonny Storm vs. Mick Foley
* Jonny Storm vs. La Parka Jr.
* Octagon & Mikey Whipwreck vs. The Impact Players
* Tag Team Invitational - winner gets an LIW contract.
* Team USA vs. The Harris Twins vs. Arn Anderson & Lash LeRoux
* La Parka Jr. vs. Mick Foley

Also confirmed for A Challenge Accepted are Rico, Kensuke Sasaki, and Scott Steiner. We'll see you on the 26th!

*****

Eric "Critic of the Dawn"